Good lord, were we wrong.
We first started hearing the buzz about it through our little "Bravo grapevine" and to be honest, we originally attributed that to attempts to puff up the show after the disappointing showing of Top Design. When we went to the TD finale party, Bravo rep after Bravo rep asked us "Are you blogging about Shear Genius?" It wasn't until Andy Cohen came up to us and said "You guys are going to LOVE it! Just wait till you see it, guys." that we decided to give it a shot.
So last night, we begrudgingly sat down to watch the first episode and honeys, we are HOOKED. Instead of doing a strict recap, let's run down the reasons why we love it so.
1. A FABULOUS Hostess. Jaclyn. Seriously, what needs to be said? Girl STILL looks incredible. And after suffering through Heidi, The Early Years, and Todd, The Children's Show Host, how goddamn refreshing to see someone who's got 40 years of experience reading lines and acting on camera. Not one wrong note. She was smooth and cool and sexy and knew what to say. You go, Kelly Garrett!
2. Rene Fris' Tight Little Ass. Seriously, Bravo. If you gave his ass its own spinoff, there'd be no complaining from this quarter. Which leads us to...
3. Flamboyant Gay Men Pretending to be Straight. Oh
Dr. Boogie. You were drooling over Rene. Own it. And if you can't own it, then thank you for all the jokes we're going to make at your expense all season.3. Gay Frodo. Ohmigod, how adorable is Theodore? We thought his little treasure chest of Nexus products was
hysterical and his "Come on, let's go play." when he picked out his model was exactly, EXACTLY the kind of attitude we love to see on reality show competitions.4. Scary Hair Witch. Tabatha, we wouldn't want to meet you under the light of a full moon, but so long as you practice your
witchcraft behind the safety of our television screen, we will continue to love you. You are sour and serious, but damn if that hair creation wasn't breathtaking.5. Cutting the Biggest Asshole First. MAJOR kudos on this one. We couldn't have taken Paul-Jean for more than a couple episodes at most (and how delicious that Rene clearly hated him), but we were actually shocked that they
let him go so early in the game instead of keeping him around to be the villain. Which leads us to ...6. Drama Queen Hairdressers. Of course, there are plenty of villains to take his place. Hairdressers aren't known for being low-key or ego-free so this crowd is sure to provide some fabulously over-the top bitchery. And the ones that aren't
bitches are total on-camera messes. Evangelin bursting into tears over how much she loves hair? COMEDY GOLD. And Lacey? Bitch, you need to GO.7. FABULOUS Sets. From the salon, to the runway to the living space, this show was pure eye-candy. Maybe a bit too Real World-ish, but after ten weeks of looking at those awful PDC pods on Top Design and three years of watching pissed-off models clomp down the Black Runway of
Doom, it's refreshing to have such a fun, candy-colored backdrop for the bitchery.Plus, we love the judges so far and we don't love the models which is fantastic, because the only thing more fun than making fun of bitchy hairdressers is making fun of lousy models. Sold!
So yes, darlings. Bravo sucked us in once again. We won't be doing daily blogging about the show, but you can count on us to rip these bitches at least once a week. Fun!
EDITED TO ADD:
Shear Genius is available on iTunes. The first episode is currently a free download. Click here to download the episode.
92 comments:
I was so hoping that the "Shear Bitchery" would begin!
if you were going to blog it, "shear bitchery" would have been a great name!
Wait a minute, if you don't have a separate blog for it, how are you going to work my "Two snippy bitches making cutting remarks" tagline in?
Plus, I personally give it a week before you're ripping screen-shots out of your asses and giving this one the full-on treatment because ALL I could think of the whole time I was watching this show was, "HOW am I going to live without a T&L blog on this shit?" Because, I'm sorry, there was some NONSENSE coming down that runway! I'm sitting there like, "I know what they'd say about this," and "This would be a whole post right there, just the look on that bitch's face."
I love it that they just tell you the three best and the three worst. No long drawn-out single "You can stay." "So can you." "Okay, you too."
And *God* you guys are so right about Jaclyn Smith. Does she have a portrait in the attic or something? All those Charlie's Angels except Farrah look sensational, and I don't really think they have work done. They don't have that look, you know?
Anne
What's up with Paul-Jean's OBVIOUSLY fake accent. It came and went freely throughout the episode. I bet he is really John-Paul Smith from Jersey...
Ooooooh. I wasn't planning on watching it. But you've convinced me to try and catch one of the thousand of reruns Bravo will show.
So, what's going to happen to the P:TD blog?
Um, I didn't watch the whole episode, but through the first mini-challenge with the mannequin heads, Jaclyn added absolutely nothing to the conversation. I mean, nothing. If first season Heidi was bad, this is worse.
oh yay!!! hallelujah!! i am SO excited!! i have, sitting on my head, right this minute, the single worst haircut i've ever had in my very long life. i am full of rage directed at hair people and will delight ~ nay, revel ~ in your bitchitude directed toward these fiends with scissors.
Dr. Boogie stating that he wasn't gay? All I could think was "Bitch, please!"
P.S. - "Gay Frodo"...priceless!
wow - I totally missed the part where Dr boogie said he wasn't gay. WTF???? Please please please blog this show!!!!!!!!!!!!
CO
I was so pleasantly surprised by Shear Genius. It was just so fun!
And yeah, I've already fallen in love with Theodore. We're close in age, so maybe I can snag him.
I agree - the first episode was FA-BOO. And I also agree that you need to devote more than just one a week to this show. The mix of personalities is priceless, and ripe for the bitching. It's like they made the show specifically for the two of you to blog about. Pleeeeeeeeeeeeease!!!!
Girls, nobody likes a liar--I give you through the second episode before you are P:SD on a daily basis! And, "2 snippy bitches making cutting remarks" is a totally FAB tagline!
I couldn't keep my tired a$$ up to watch it on Wednesday, but I will definitely be parking it on the sofa at 9 PM next week to watch the 1st episode rerun and then plunge right into episode 102.
I am so glad you love it! You guys make a dreary show like Top Design fun, but you make a good show into shear heaven!
I was so happy to think that I would NOT have to add another program to my TiVo...and then you came out with this.
Oy vey. Gotta go and record the first episode and then program a season pass. If it's this tough keeping up with you, how hard is it to BE you???
xxoo
don't forget the ikea furniture they have to sleep on!!! hehe (you can hella recognize it when they go into their loft)
I too would love it if you blogged this show. The suggested taglines are too good to be wasted.
Please, please, please, unless it will jeopardize your marriage, please, please, please blog this show!
Yay! I happened to catch some of it during my lunch hour yesterday and I thought "THIS is what TD was supposed to be and wasn't." I know you're just blowing smoke at us and are setting up Project Shear Genius as we speak.
My money's on Gay Frodo! Too bad I'm a girl cause he's totally cute!
Don't you think Rene looks like the bastard child of JohnJohn Kennedy and Jackson Browne? Where's he from? I couldn't place the accent. And thanks for posting the gratuitous butt shot. Tres hot.
Oh, I am SO happy you guys are going to rip this shit apart!!! I didn't think I would like the show either, but my god it sucked me in too, damn you bravo.... Oh and what about the linebacker model that was walking like she was going to make a touchdown!!
And *God* you guys are so right about Jaclyn Smith. Does she have a portrait in the attic or something? All those Charlie's Angels except Farrah look sensational, and I don't really think they have work done. They don't have that look, you know?
Anne
Anne, hate to burst your bubble, but Jacquelyn Smith used to be one of my clients and while she is gracious, polite warm and friendly (I can't say enough positive things about how down to earth and wonderfull she was/is) she most definitly has had work done. She would come in pre lift (this was before Botox) and her hair would be in her face hiding the sag and she would come in after with the hair back showing off how pulled and tucked everything was and good for her!!!
MT
oh and btw LOVE THIS FREAKIN SHOW
All of the good elements of PR and TC with bitchy over the top drama.
It is my new Wednesday night indulgence!
MT
Didn't see it! (Kids on Spring Break - mom in sleep deprived hell!) But I even came up with a "blog line" for you: Shear Genius - They cut - we blog with razor sharp wit"
Oh and kind of an FYI, Shear Genius just happens to be the real name of the salon where I get my hair done - go figure.
oh and another thing, I would travel to middle earth and back to get a date with gay Frodo!!!
MT
(last post I promise I have to get SOME work done today)
Anonymous said...
wow - I totally missed the part where Dr boogie said he wasn't gay. WTF???? Please please please blog this show!!!!!!!!!!!!
CO
4/13/2007 1:26 PM
Not only that but the full quote was something like "I'm not gay or anything like that but I couldn't stop looking at Rene, he's gorgeous!" While wearing a be-dazzled bandana. Nothing ambiguous there...
Theodore looks EXACTLY like Dylan Michalchuk from Degrassi, when I first saw the promos I actually did a double take
Well then, guess we're all going along for the ride!
Nooooo... I was planning on weaning myself from Bravo programming until PR comes back. You guys were the only reason I watched Top Design, I hate to get sucked back in!
Fine. You twisted my arm.
Thank GOD you're writing about this show! As soon as I watched it, I thanked the Bravo gods for making up for Top Design. This was EVERYTHING I had been hoping for!
oh goody! can't wait to watch it no! =)
darn it . . . "now."
OHMYGOD that is awesome. I'm so gld you guys are doing Shear Genius!
Rene is so fucking HOT! That Tight Little Ass is HOT!!
Gay Frodo? LOL. LOVE IT.
I loved the show! I kept thinking about you two bitches the whole time.
I can't wait for your posts!
I was so not going to watch this show, didn't watch TD, so I figured why watch this... but after your post, I'm all over it, and now must get on Tivo to find the pilot in a re-run (but it's Bravo, so it shouldn't be too hard).
OMG, does this mean I have to watch this now?
Oh well, it's not like I had anything else to do with my Wednesday nights.
Dr. Boogie is straight???
straight from one man to another!
MT
I'm so glad I'm not the only one who loved this, and I'll join the chorus of people pleading for a full on blog. After Top Design, I thought Bravo's competition shows would only go downhill, but boy was I wrong! This one'll give PR a run for the money. I think the short-term nature of the projects allows them to devote more time to the contestants' personalities--I already feel attached to some of these contestants. And the single work room set-up and the housing set-up allows more fun and games. And the hair art challenge was pure fun fabulosity.
Ha! While watching the premiere I kept thinking "T&L can't resist" - so glad I was right!! Bravo's got some great fodder this time 'round, I mean, Storm - oops Tabatha and the spit-out-the-coffee "straight" Dr. Boogie are just the tip of the shears there. Do it up girls - this deserves the full treatment, capped, foiled, highlighted and all.
There were moments when I felt like I was watching an infomercial, but eventually things got better. I love Rene and his tight ass. Love you blog!
Oh, that little nervous nellie with the glasses and the spiky hair! I thought if he didn't shut up I was going to come through the TV and slap him!
And the petulant blonde with the chip on her shoulder because she's younger than everyone else!
When Dr Boogie walked over to pick out his model and grabbed Rene's hand, and Rene yanked it away like he suddenly got Cooties!
And that female judge! Love her!
I was actually busy working and the show was on in the background but I'll tell you, it was a distraction! I hope the show maintains it's high standards!
I'm glad you're going to be blogging on this, even if it's only weekly.
BrianB
Thank you.
You like us. You really really like us.
(or else you would've kept your fabulousity to yourselves and your oh-so-glam posse chez Bennett-Shelton and we minions would've been on our own. Would not have been even remotely the same.)
I picture television execs at Bravo pitching show ideas and seriously asking "Would Tom and Lorenzo eat this shit up?" If the answer is yes then it goes on the air.
I too thought I was gonna hate it. While nothing will ever live up to Project Runway in my book, Shear Design looks like one helluva ride.
If a seperate blog is outa the question how about just using the Top Design site and change everything but the URL? Or hell...blogs are free...just do one already. Shear Design is everything we thought Top Design was gonna be and deserves your special form of bitchery.
Gregg
"Not only that but the full quote was something like "I'm not gay or anything like that but I couldn't stop looking at Rene, he's gorgeous!" While wearing a be-dazzled bandana. Nothing ambiguous there..."
Bah. There's nothing remotely ambigous about Dr. Boogie, flowers in hair, self-congratulory fairy pats on the shoulder, yadda yadda yadda...
While I'm a hetero woman, I did grow up with a brother just like him, who I knew was not a boy since he was in nursery school. I was lucky to be a tomboy because he liked my dresses. A lot. I finally realized what he was when I had a word for it around the 5th grade for me (this was the mid 70's). At the time my brother was about 8 and I was praying for the day he outgrew me so he wouldn't play dressup in my shit anymore. I wanted to wear it first, bitch. :-)
Boogie, you're a hairdresser in West Hollywood. You wore an older sister's clothes back in the day in the privacy of your home. Give it up, girlfriend. The gig is soooo up. Like there ever was one.
MT, who is supposed to be working, said:
Anne, hate to burst your bubble, but Jacquelyn Smith used to be one of my clients and while she is gracious, polite warm and friendly (I can't say enough positive things about how down to earth and wonderfull she was/is) she most definitly has had work done.
INFIDEL!!!!!! YOU LIE!!!!!
Tom! Lorenzo! MT said Jaclyn had work done!!!!!
I believe you, but I feel like I felt when I found out there was no Santa Claus. Or when bigassbelle gently broke it to me that Tim Gunn is gay.
Anne
Rene Fris is the best thing that happened to the show. That queen Dr. Boogie is CRAZY... And I am so glad that Paul Jean got kicked out this early. he's horrible!
The show is definitely entertaining!!!
I think Paul Jean was channeling Malan with that fake accent. (Sorry, Malan--I do love you)
I wasn't sure about this show, but I got hooked halfway through and the time slot is perfect. Top Design really blew, quite frankly, and I need a fix to see me through until season 4 PR resumes.
I can't wait to see you guys blast these bitches!
I'm a total tagline hater (sorry Jonathan), but how glad am I that the tagline for this isn't, "You're hairstory."
Am I the only one who thought the loft space looked like Carisa designed it (which to me is a very very good thing)?
The first episode is free on itunes, if anyone missed it.
I posted a suggestion for a tagline over at ProjectTopDesign, but since you WILL be blogging this show (oh, please do, the energy of this show was like a shot of espresso after TD) I'll post it here too.
"They cut. We're cutting."
Seriously. Love you guys.
Fun is right! Do blog! Do do do!
Bravo is totally designing shows for y'all to blog. (They have to - TD would have been in the toilet without you.) Way to go - I wasn't planning to watch it at all, but it was much more fun than expected.
{mumble grumble}
Oh, all right. This kitten will trust T&L. I'll catch it on the rerun. (It had better be more interesting than TD. The whole two episodes I watched, I heard Michael Caine from "Miss Congeniality" in the back of my mind: "I once had a girl who rearranged furniture...")
"Shear bitchery" amd "two snippy bitches making cutting remarks" are worth using, lol.
I don't see why you're not doing daily blogging.
I mean, season 2 of project runway will be over soon.
And this is surprisingly a tooon better than Top Design.
I wasn't going to watch Shear Genius either, but I did by accident, and i'm happy I did. Tabatha is awesomely bitchy. every other confessional she's saying "F**K U!" to someone! Daisy's my favorite though.
Oh man, I missed it! I wasn't going to watch this, but now I have to see when the reruns are so I can keep up with you!!!
Ok, I'll make a public idiot of myself...
Tagline: "Coif With Their Heads"
BrianB
Re: Dr. Boogie.
Let's not forget he told Rene he was going to pinch his nipples, to which Rene replied "If you do that, you will not win the $100,000." Priceless.
Even Danny Franco wasn't so bold with Heidi. And he was PRETTY bold...
Hell to the no, Bobby. Dr. Boogay just said, "I'm not gay or anything, but I can't stop staring at him"?? Ol' girl is walking around looking like a pirate in drag, and he's saying he's not family? We gotta save our people, man.
The only reason I will watch this show is because you guys are going to blog about it!
You two rule the world!
I wasn't going to watch this show. But if you're going to write about it, I'll have to change my mind.
Bravo! needs to put you guys on salary (well, maybe not, conflict of interest, you know), but I swear they've only got an audience for Top Design and for this one because of you.
shrinkykitten-
totally disagree - "You're hairstory." = BRILLIANT ;)
I hope Jaclyn reads this blog and picks it up (although I guess it would be too late for that now...)
Boys - you realize you're going to have to start another blog. All these comments already and you've only had one post. It's BEGGING for it. I recommend just ditchig the PTD one, although it was also brilliant. This show needs you! So do we, your faithful readers.
Much love to you T&L!!!
Well if you boys say it's worth a go... Let the snark flow.
i think this is going to be worth just for rene's accent. he's like a cross between jose eber and arnold schwartzenager.
"Queer Genius" -- that's you guys. If you are keeping the "Project" stuff for branding reasons, maybe: "Project Shear Genius: Cutting Cut Cutters."
BTW, you make me proud to live in Philly you cool boys!
I watched the rerun this afternoon just so that I could be totally on board with this since you are blogging it. Put it wherever you want..we will follow you there.
T&L you totally make my day!
Finally got around to watching this---it's everything Top Design should have been but wasn't. I'll actually be looking forward to this show---and to the GayBoy treatment it so richly deserves!
Oh yeah, and it's ALL ABOUT Rene's gorgeous ass! More, please!
If we beg really really nicely, then will you consider devoting a full blog to it??? Please please please with a cherry on top? I just got engaged and what could be better than planning a wedding and reading T&L blog Shear Genius??? I can't think of much.
I must have missed Dr. Boogie say he was straight. That's a shock b/c irl he totally owns his homosexuality! Everyone knows he's gay and he's proud of it. Wonder why he said that??
I accept Bravo's apology for Top Design, this show is great!
Oh, yay! Top Design was SOOO unfun! "Here's your 700K loft, and 150K to decorate." Someone PLEASE drop that challenge on MY head.
This show, on the other hand, will be wunnerful. I LOVED the "F/O buddy" eye darts Tabatha was shooting in the feather aisle. Jean-Paul would have made great drama, but it surprised me that Mr. B. Hills came up with such a supremely fugly hairstyle.
And yay for "Treasure Head". That model worked it like she LOVVVVEED wearing that crap.
This will do nicely until PR steps back up!
I'm joining the chorus. Please blog 'Shear Genius.' It looks like a much better prospect than the dreariness that was TD.
My vote for your new tag line is "They snip. We snipe."
Please get a MySpace so I could put you at number one. :/
All I have to say to junior_goddess is WORD.
Oh, yay! Top Design was SOOO unfun! "Here's your 700K loft, and 150K to decorate." Someone PLEASE drop that challenge on MY head.
Maybe that's what was so wrong with the show. They paid more for a table or a couch than I paid for my car. And *still* couldn't come up with anything I would want to live in!
But really I think that it was the lack of avant-garde edge that was wrong with it. On Shear Bitchery, it was like the first season on PR when Wendy Pepper made that bikini out of candy. I mean, sure, hated it, but at least it was out there enough to make fun of. The design show wasn't fun, because the things that would make a design show fun don't allow people to show actual design talent. What lets people show actual design talent is combining architecture and decoration to make a space fabulous, and you can't make a 12x12 cube fabulous.
I don't know.
Anne
I just realized that "Shear Bitchery" isn't the name, I stole it from beckyw. But what does it say about the GayBoys that I can't remember the ACTUAL name?
Anne
Oh, bad GayBoys! You very bad 'Boys!
Now I'm hooked. I watched the repeat today. Yes, Jacqui can read lines beautifully, and that melifluous voice and flowing hair is something that I can only hope to emulate. Well, the hair anyway. I got the voice, but I digress....
Oh yes, you are bad, There goes my beauty sleep on Wednesday nights!
LOL - maybe the Boys should just do a blog of "All BRAVO - All the Time!"
Do you even get to watch anything else BESIDES BRAVO??
Oh, and I am changing my "tagline" suggestion (even though there are others I like much better) to: "They Style - we cut with razor sharp wit."
Oh...boys... how do I love thee... <3 <3
I was totally hooked too. Awsome! Can't wait for Wednesday awsome.
And I loved that Jacklyn went "Oh.. I disagree!" to Sally Hershberger... right on the first episode. Angel is FIERCE!
Please, do blog!
I too was watching and thinking about what you would say throughout the show. This show is so much more fun than TD, and seems custom-made for the T&L treatment.
I'm pretty almost absolutely sort of positively sure that Dr. Boogie WAS JOKING!
And no one can accuse the producers of keeping in the assholes and freaks just for drama after getting rid of Paul Jean so early (Tim said the same thing after Malan was aufed).
Wasn't it great when Paul John was leaving and he dramatically turned and left, touched a few hands, wasn't sure what to do with Tabatha and then dropped his fabulous sun glasses. So our last view of him was his ass as he bent over to pick them up?
Anyone else hoping to see some quality bonding between Tabatha and Dr. Boogie?
You have made us sooooooo happy with this announcement!!!!
Just saw the show on iTunes (no Bravo in Podunk, Texas) and I agree with all of your comments. I give you about 10 more hours before you start a new blog. Love the judges esp J. Smith even if she has had work done. Hated Paul Jean so good riddance to bad rubbish. Wanted to hate on Tabatha but now I am intrigued; she's sort of an unholy spawn of Satan, Endora, and Judi Dench!!
Damn. How's a hard working girl supposed to get any sleep if she's up until all hours watching these damn addictive TV shows?
And, how is she supposed to get any work done if she's reading three fabulous blogs by her favorite bitchy gay couple?
Boy's you just wait for Tabatha! She's one of us; let her mouth go even further. Twisted, lovely, frank and spills the F Bombs like a navy seal. Yeah, you may be afraid of her under a full moon, but once you get to know her just a little bit. Frankly, F@$#king Fantastic. Love Her...she is edgy and fierce and can't wait till she beats someone with a mannequin head!
guys, thank you so much for your blogs! I look forward to your updates everyday. And I wouldn't have watched Shear Genuis had I not seen your post -- I look forward to watching along with you!
Oh, child, I want Tabatha as my next Bad Mommy!!
sorry- I'd hit Paul Jean- he has that smarmy french accent I adore...
Dahlings, Shear Genius is, well, sheer genius.
I just got back from abroad 3.2 seconds ago, and I am so happy to be in august company when it comes to bitchery, sniping, snipping, clippin', and dishin' this show.
Love you guys.
you guys don't think dr boogie was just throwing some snark out there?
Come on, who would he have thought he was kidding?
Is it true Dr Boogie is not actually a doctor?
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