Judge Not.

Saturday, November 17, 2007 by
Darlings, we consider ourselves scholars of all things PR at this point and we've learned many things in our time obsessively examining every millisecond of every show. Occasionally, we like to share one of these pearls of wisdom with you. Get a pen.

When, somewhere down the road - could be next week, could be some time in January - somebody you've grown to love makes a perfectly acceptable outfit and gets aufed and/or someone you've grown to hate makes vomit out of fabric and wins immunity; when you throw things at your screen and punch your throw pillows; when you storm off dramatically announcing that you will NEVER watch this show again (knowing perfectly well that you will), we've found it's best to keep things in perspective and remember one thing:



Heidi Klum is a judge on Project Runway.



Let us repeat that.

HEIDI KLUM IS A JUDGE ON PROJECT RUNWAY.

The viewing experience is so much more fun when you bear that in mind.

(Photos: Mazur/WireImage)

61 comments:

Anonymous said...

ROFL. Oh my god I can't stop laughing, you guys. What was she thinking? I mean, seriously.

Erica said...

haha, she's usually the one complaining when an outfit looks cheap...

The Scarlett said...

Crack is wack, Heidi. Just say no.

Anonymous said...

Amen to that.

Anonymous said...

It looks really uncomfortable.

BigAssBelle said...

damn, what was Seal thinking??

DolceLorenzo said...

OHMYGOD...my sister called me to tell about this post. I kid you not.


Hahahahaha. I love this woman!!!

Anonymous said...

The real question is... is she wearing any panties underneath that?

Anonymous said...

Granted, this was at some Victoria's Secret event, so I suppose she can be forgiven for wearing something so short and sparkly.

But the butt cleavage is certainly something else.

Anonymous said...

Yay! New posts on the weekend!!

It's like a crayon box exploded on her. I'm not even going to mention the butt cleavage. That's just wrong.

Anonymous said...

Oh, Heidi. Even if you have the toned butt of a supermodel, there is no excuse for butt cleavage.

On the other, hand, props for the faces. I think I like goofy-Heidi.

GothamTomato said...

At first glance, this outfit might not be as bad as it seems.

The fact that we can see her crack proves that she actually does have an ass. Up until now, she has given no indication that she has any ass at all. In fact, I'd been thinking that maybe we, as concerned citizens, should hold a telethon to get this girl some much needed bedonkedonk.

However, on second glance, it might be worse than it seems. If we can see her crack then she's not wearing any panties - and that dress is awfully short.

I just hope she knows how to get in & out of the limo without waving at her gynecologist.

--Gotham Tomato

Saskia said...

As Nina would say, "I question her taste level."

GothamTomato said...

...then again, I suppose that if I was married to Seal, and insanely gorgeous, I might run around without panties as well.

But I swear, if I have to see one more bald vajayjay plastered across the internet, I'm going to scream, so she better hit the cymbals. That's all I'm saying.

--Gotham Tomato

Anonymous said...

I wonder if she knew what was going on down there.

Brandenburg3rd said...

The fabric is fun, but talk about too much tootie...!

Anonymous said...

What would I say to Mr. and Mrs. Seal, given these photographs? Well, I believe it was William Murray in "Stripes" who put it so well: "I want to party with you."

c.tabor said...

In the words of Heidi herself, "It looks cheap, no?"

Um, yes, Heidi.

Anonymous said...

Can't....stop.....laughing..........



.........help!

Anonymous said...

Hey, hey! This is her first time out of maternity wear in two seasons!! She has the right to have butt cleavage and...wear...glittering neon stripes....::bursts into laughter:: HAHAAHAH!! Oh Heidi, you crazy.

Anonymous said...

purple and yellow sparkly and butt cleavage. She may be a supermodel (and, improbably, the mother of three )but that is super nasty and makes one wonder if this is another incident of getting dressed in the dark?
CP

Anonymous said...

Looks like someone took a page from the Britney Spears playbook.

Supermodel or not, NO ONE should be caught dead or alive in something that gaudy or cheap looking. Next time she goes shopping.

Want some advice Heidi ? Next time try Walmart or Target. At least you won't get ripped off so bad.

Anonymous said...

Wasn't it Heidi who coined
the phrase 'Hoochie Mama'?
If the phrase fits....

Anonymous said...

Heidi looks fabulous in anything--and in this case--very little of anything. She has a beautifully toned body and is rightfully proud. Her playful confidence is sexy. I mean she WAS at a lingerie event--not a PTA meeting after all.

Anonymous said...

Brandenburg3rd said...
The fabric is fun, but talk about too much tootie...!

6:33 PM

Definitely too much tootie! Althouogh it does give Seal very easy access......

Anonymous said...

Girl is so unbelievably wholesome-looking she can wear something like this and not come off as vulgar!

-- desertwind

Beef and Fur said...

Maybe she has it on backwards....no?

Lilithcat said...

She forgot to get dressed!!

Anonymous said...

Just remember that Heidi once explained she married Seal because he has one hell of a schvantz in those pants...

Anonymous said...

America is crazy country, ja?

Crow Winters said...

She looks insanely trashed.

Magnolia said...

It is funny to listen to her critiques when her own garment doesn't quite make it work.

Anonymous said...

I can't wait to see "Mean P" come out.

I had no problem watching the videos, it must be your settings, browser or something.

Anonymous said...

I've seen that dress before... in college... on a poster - under a blacklight.

Anonymous said...

Where the heck is Anne Slowey when you need her?

kath said...

When I saw this on Go Fug Yourself, I imagined what the other judges would have said to her. All the other posters here, pretty much said it all!
What was she thinking?

Anonymous said...

When my group gathers to watch we always make fun of Heidis choices, we call her Swiss Miss, due to some braided atrocity she wore in a previous season. Remember the maternity top from last season that looked like a curtain rod and curtains?

Your pointing out that she is a judge and never forget that is spot on boys.

We always "question her taste level." Her bod and face always save her from total fashion meltdown.

sixgables said...

I saw this on the Fug and was secretly pleased that even Heidi no longer has a perfectly smooth, toned back. I'll take it as a sign that I don't have to go to the gym.

Anonymous said...

Oh my. That is entirely too much tootie, even if it is on someone as beautiful as Heidi Klum.

Anonymous said...

I'm glad she's happy, having a good time with her sweet husband Seal, but showing your butt-crack is just tacky.

How many times have we heard Heidi say to the designers "That's something a hooker would wear"?

lisasabatier said...

Thank you, it will help, I feel better about Uncle Nick now.

Anonymous said...

Well, I don't know. Careful introspection reveals that if I looked anything like Heidi does, I might give something like that a whirl to the VS secret party, too. NOT to the PTA of course.

I don't have a problem with butt cracks as long as they are displayed in the proper setting. That's all I'm sayin'.

lisasabatier said...

Oh, and aprapos of nothing. I hate Jillian.

Gorgeous Things said...

Hahahahahahahahahahaha! Snort!

I just got back from New York City, and I needed a dose of LMAO funny to counter the monotony of the Merritt Parkway (not a commentary on CT, just on long drives). Thanks darlings!

Saskia said...

Is anyone else oddly distracted by the clear plastic strip running across Heidi's back? It took me a while to figure out what it was (at first I thought it was some odd skin wrinkle, or a mark left by a bra worn earlier in the night), and now I can't stop looking at it. I understand why it's there, but it looks yucky to me -- industrial-strength double-sided tape on the edges of the back of the dress would have been better.

Anonymous said...

Good point, saskia. I think it's safe to say that if you need THAT MUCH tape to hold your dress in place then you should probably consider wearing something else.

Oh, Mrs. Seal, please, just say no to CRACK!

Anonymous said...

When I saw this last night, I KNEW this post was coming, just not so....SOON!!!!!

Crack is, indeed, wack. Even Heidi's. But now we might have some insight on how she gets knocked up so easily. Not like Seal has to WORK for it or anything...baby #4 should be forthcoming next summer.

Anonymous said...

Heidi said on Oprah the first thing that got her interested in him was seeing him giant schlong through his workout shorts. I guess in Seal's case it was her crack.

Anonymous said...

Did Heidi Klum not notice her butt crack showing? I don't get it.

Anonymous said...

Oh. My. God.
I can't close my mouth. I now have lockjaw. WTF! Did she not know her ass was showing? Did Seal not tell her the ass was showing? Who does that? Better question, who does that on purpose? Wow. What else is there to say?

Emma P.

Sewhat? said...

If I didn't know better I would have said that was a picture of Tinsley Mortimer...and that is NOT a good thing.

Anonymous said...

That is entirely too much tootie

Vic said...

Shock jock Heidi. Nice to know her crack looks no better than mine.

Anne said...

Butt crack with no panties, not even a jeweled thong?

Ew.

eric3000 said...

Excellent point! LOL!

The amazing thing is that she's actually a pretty good judge. Is it just one of those "those who can't do teach" kind of things or does she just not own a full-length mirror?

JoeNik said...

Heidi looks like she's wearing some weird psychedelic straitjacket. Who let this nut out in public?

Anonymous said...

Can anyone else here our beloved Tim Gunn going, "Oh God," in that blank sort of despair he uses from time to time on the show?

Anonymous said...

That's just wrong.

Anonymous said...

She comes across as so desperate.

Jenn said...

HOLY CRAP, that is so funny. I will remember that, thanks

Anonymous said...

"Beef and Fur said...
Maybe she has it on backwards....no?"

Brilliant!

I can stop reading the comments on this one now.