Bring it, Bitches.

Thursday, November 08, 2007 by
Let's get to it, shall we?

Kevin Christiana:


Lorenzo: I hated it. I thought it was very "Jeffrey" and not in a good way.
Tom: I didn't mind it. It's a bit plain. Hate the tights, though.


Lorenzo: Love it! Thought the pants were hot as hell. Extremely impressed with the structure and fit of the jacket.
Tom: I hate to say it, but I agree. Much as I wish they weren't, formal shorts are very hot right now. A nicely put-together look.


Tom: Bleh. Talbot's for teenagers.
Lorenzo. Yeah, it's like mother and daughter dressed in one look.

Victorya Hong:

Lorenzo: I absolutely HATE sashes.
Tom: At least it's not tied in a bow. I don't mind this look. It's simple, but overall it works.


Lorenzo: I think Camilla saved this outfit. It's basically the same thing, different color.
Tom: I don't think even SHE could save it. Those are pukey colors - and I hate all that crap on the top.


Tom: LOVE.
Lorenzo: We could have made the same criticisms about this one, but there was something about the way it moved, combined with the colors. It was breathtaking when she walked.
Tom: I agree. The colors absolutely made this outfit. Personally, my favorite out of the whole show. Simple done right.
Lorenzo: Mine too. A perfect example of needing to see the outfit in person. The pictures didn't do it justice.

Elisa Jimenez:

Lorenzo: I was DUMBFOUNDED when I saw this. I loved it. Of course, you have to have zero body fat to wear it, but hey. If you do...
Tom: I was surprised at how well executed this was. It looks like some sort of loopy deconstructed thing when you first see it, but when she walked past us, I could see how well-made it was. Pure high-impact.


Tom: Speaking of loopy, deconstructed things...
Lorenzo: Did she even use a needle and a thread?
Tom: No, a loom.


Tom: Well, she's barefoot, so we'd hate it no matter what.
Lorenzo: What's with the top a different color?
Tom: You can see color?
Lorenzo: She looks like she's wet.
Tom: And not in the good way.
Lorenzo: Hates it.
Tom: Concurs.

Rami Kashou:

Lorenzo: Oh my God, don't get me started on this one.
Tom: Kayne, party of one. Kayne, party of one. I don't hate it, but you go ahead.
Lorenzo: It looks like she was gift-wrapped - in a dollar store.
Tom: I agree that she looks a little lamp-shadey and the fabric is awful, but if Rami - *sigh*
Lorenzo: *sigh*
Tom: - if he wanted to impress the crowd with his construction skills, mission accomplished.


Tom: One thing I noticed right off the bat is that Amanda could barely walk in this.
Lorenzo: And that bitch can WALK. It's a fucking prom dress.
Tom: It's Morticia's prom dress. I hate that bustline.


Lorenzo: I love your drapes.
Tom: Put a couch in front of her.
Lorenzo: I feel a bit bad because Rami - *sigh*
Tom: *sigh*
Lorenzo: - he can do better. Quite frankly, I'm disappointed.
Tom: Like I said, I think he was trying to show off his construction skills, but this was all just a little too goddess-y by way of Star Trek. Maybe it would look better on a green bitch.
Lorenzo: I don't know how else to say it, but his approach comes off way too "fashiony."

Simone LeBlanc:

Tom: *HURL*
Lorenzo: I'm speechless.
Tom: I'm not. First: the gloves. I know they're trendy right now but I think they look RIDICULOUS. Second, this was VERY deconstructed up close. Unfinished hems and all. Third: The COLORS are HIDEOUS.
Lorenzo: Um. I agree.


Lorenzo: Apparently she got a deal on that fabric.
Tom: It does have "99 cents/yard" written all over it.


Lorenzo: Okay, we see your boobs. I mean, there's nothing there.
Tom: It's quite a feat to make something hideous AND nondescript at the same time. It's like...invisibly ugly.

(Photos: G. Gershoff/WireImage)

54 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm glad I'm not the only one to think both Rami *sigh* and gad, those dresses are horrible! The one on Marilinda makes her look about 50 lbs heavier.

I liked the little shift on Javi. And that weird first one of Elisa's grew on me, but that middle one-ugh!

The formal shorts are hurl-worthy!

Anonymous said...

The gloves. Well.

I love gloves. I am famous for my gloves. I have glove boxes full of them (right near the hat boxes).

But you know what? The length, color and fabric of the pair I wear will complement my outfit. I do not wear short black leather gloves with light-colored filmy materials. I wear them with my black leather jacket, fer cryin' out loud!

DolceLorenzo said...

OHMYGOD LOL I love you, bitches. You had to do this type of commentary more often. You bitches are hilarious! I liked Kevin's looks a lot.

My sister's saying that she liked Victorya's.

DolceLorenzo said...

You HAVE to do...

Anonymous said...

Woot! finally some pictures I can look at.
I'm puzzled, it looks like a lot of them only sent one strong look down the runway- Such a big chance, looks like the would have taken advantage of it.
Kevin- The school boy is the strongest, It's cute. The other two not so much.
Victorya- Zerox award. Except for the soggy looking trench coat. I'll have to take your word on the red dress (it looks like the others to me).
Elisa- Hmmm.. I can't tell for the execution. But the 2nd one looks the strongest. Based on her interviews ect.. I'm thinking she is going to be the 1st one to go.
Rami- Yeah, I agree. He is very talented. I wonder if they are going to have a drapy, sculpty challenge to show case his skills? I pretty sure he will show at OFW and that he is the one that Heidi is rooting for. As far as his dresses go, the 3rd one is the most original.
Simone- Another zerox collection. She really likes the shiney. And the mini black gloves, and the hooker spike heels..

Anonymous said...

Not impressed with any of them, except Rami. I do like his dresses.

Anonymous said...

I kind of liked Elisa's outfits. They reminded me of some of the fashions you see in my country, Venezuela, especially the first look.

Anonymous said...

Meow.

Bite.

Rip.

Sharpen claws, sharpen tongue.

Repeat.

If you can't say something nice, I wish I was sitting right next to you taking notes.

Tell us what you REALLY think.

As always, luv you two bitches ... I mean that from the bottom of my faggity judgemental little heart.

More please.

Just sayin-

mjude said...

THE BITCHES IS BACK! :)

LMFAO!!

Anonymous said...

Just interjecting to say that my S3 DVD just arrived in the mail. I know what hubby & I are doing this weekend!

Anonymous said...

I think those dress shorts are horrible, when I watched the runway show the model looked like she had a super sonic wedgie. Maybe they are good in a photo but not in real life.

I don't see anything that rocks my dock.

Anonymous said...

Shiny. Pleated. High-waisted. Formal shorts.
Four things that should never go together.
Ugly, yes. Invisible? Unfortunately not.

GothamTomato said...

Rami's dresses were perfectly ugly but beautifully contructed. The one on Marilinda was a marvel. I can't even figure out how she got into it. It looked like he must have built the dress around her.

The barefoot dress--eeeeeyikes. Aside from being seriously matronly (I can picture exactly the kind of lizard-skinned older woman who would wear it as a beach cover-up), with that tail in the front and the back, if anyone with thighs was wearing that, all that fabric would get bunched up in their crotch when they walked, giving them the reverse wedgie of all time.

And Simone's trio?: Bohemian Kit Kat girl asking the musical question, 'Have you shopped Strawberry today?'

That red dress was a stunner.

--Gotham Tomato

GothamTomato said...

I agree about the red shorts. From the front, OK. But from the back, they gave the model a hanging bubble butt. And if they did that to a model, they'd completely disappear up the crack of a normal woman.

--Gotham Tomato

Anonymous said...

I've got a pain in my side from laughing so much.
Can you please come to my temple and join the ladies in my row...we do this every Saturday at services!!

Anonymous said...

Wonderful. Fabulous. very well thought out. Executed to a T. Great promises of things to come. A new personal best.

I'm talking about your commentary, btw. not the rags

Unknown said...

It was at this point in the show that I thought, Damn, do they all suck ass? Bleh. While I can see that Rami is one talented fellow, those dresses just look heavy and unpleasant. Perhaps he should be ON the runway instead. I couldn't decide how I felt about that crop-top number of Elisa's. On the one hand, it has WOW without being especially asstastic. But then, no. No, those slits up the insides of the legs are just wrong. But Simone? Oy. Just...bad. MORE MORE MORE!

Anonymous said...

When will you do the others?

Anonymous said...

I think this round goes to Victorya Hong.

Anonymous said...

I'm not getting the love for the red dress. It's a sack, with a scoop neck (!) and a sash, for crissakes! OK, it's a nice colour, but even I could have made this in Jr. High clothing class.

Gorgeous Things said...

Oh please people (the designers, not anyone here) - show me something worth wearing! I honestly didn't see anything that I would want to wear out of the house. Or in the house for that matter. It says something about the clothes that I kept thinking things like, "Camilla looks fabulous!" and "Amanda is so great." or "For God's sake, didn't anyone teach these girls how to walk?" "She's got no body flight!"

Yeah, I could definitely keep my eyes off the clothes.

Anonymous said...

" Anonymous said...

When will you do the others?"


Do you have to catch a bus or something, dear?

Anyway, I agree with Brett, this round goes to Victorya Hong.

Thombeau said...

YAY! A much-needed dose of bitchy queenery! Or queeny bitchery!

It will be fun to see how these kids do with the challenges on the show. They can't do any worse!

Anonymous said...

The idea of having all the designers show their work was great but liked you two ripping it even more. Must do again.

The first dress (minus the tights) and the red dress with the sash were pretty and wearable. The shorts were so fug I didn't recognize it was Clarissa wearing them (but then she's used to wearing fug because of Angela). Amanda looked very hourglassy in Rami's black dress even if she couldn't walk in it. And lime green satin is so . . . . never. It was worse than the trio of barefoot beige, and that's saying something.

-- rain brain

Anonymous said...

LOL. Aww, I missed you bitches. I can't wait!!! You guys are the best!!

gacm said...

I am reeling from your love of Elisa's first outfit. Really? Really? Oh, I'm just not getting it.....

But it is so great to have your fashion commentary back. Can't wait for S4 to start for real.

Anonymous said...

Kevin: The rubbery fabric tights are hugely fashionable right now;Clarissa saved Kevin's shorts; love the little red jacket, hate the pants.

Victorya: meh. disappointed. Really, the red dress was your favorite? God help us.

Elisa: Eileen Fisher. That first outfit has some interesting things goin' on. Someone said that is bee pollen on the last dress?

Rami: I heart you boyz. I really do. Damn glad he's not the shoe-in 'cause I wanna see him sweat!

-- desertwind

Anonymous said...

Oh, how could I overlook Simone?

I'm loving the middle outfit color/fabrics combo, but I don't know why.

- d'wind

Anonymous said...

I don't think this group "really thought about it" and there were some outfits "aesthetically not pleasing."

God, I love this show...and you boys, of course.

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry, but formal shorts are very HOT right now?! Only when they are on a bonfire lit by the flames of hatred shooting from my eyes!! At least nobody seems to wear them in the "real world" [meaning, they haven't made it to the racks of my local Marshalls].

I really wanna hunt down the person who initiated Dress Capris. It's not a suit! It's cropped pants guaranteed to make you look like you had a mishap with your tailor! And WHY are they always in the cute fabrics?

Okay, rant off on the formal "shorts". The Magpie in me actually kinda liked the photos of the shiny green outfits. But then I'm attracted to all things shiny and will take your word that they were "deconstructed". I really don't like deconstructed.

And word on the shoeless grandma just looking to bring the grandkids to the beach (or walk to the senior dinner special at the "adults only community). Seriously old-looking.

Anonymous said...

I'm glad I'm not the only one who was unimpressed with Rami's dresses. Great commentary guys!

Anonymous said...

Elisa dyed her clothes with bee pollen, according to daniel v.

Anonymous said...

"anonymous said...

Elisa dyed her clothes with bee pollen, according to daniel v."


OH. MY. GOD. Are you fucking kidding me? LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL.

Anonymous said...

Not really feeling these collections. Nothing particularly hideous but nothing special either.

Anonymous said...

"snaillady2 said...

I'm sorry, but formal shorts are very HOT right now?! Only when they are on a bonfire lit by the flames of hatred shooting from my eyes!! At least nobody seems to wear them in the "real world" [meaning, they haven't made it to the racks of my local Marshalls].... But then I'm attracted to all things shiny and will take your word that they were "deconstructed". I really don't like deconstructed."


Two words: taste level.

I thought Kevin's outfits were great. And the man has that bad boy vibe going on. I love it.

Anonymous said...

" Anonymous said...

Elisa dyed her clothes with bee pollen, according to daniel v."

It makes perfect sense....in HER world. I bet she dyes her undergarments with green tea.

Thank you for the pics, poodles.

Anonymous said...

Invisible Ugly!! HA! Love it!
Thanks, guys, that was awesome.
-Vindaloo

Anonymous said...

MarceloF said...

I thought this fashion show was a great idea to showcase all the designers' work especially the ones who get auf'd right away, but I'm a bit disappointed with what they presented. I heard some of the pieces shown were the same ones they presented for the audition process. I mean, if this was your only shot to show the world what you can do, wouldn't you create something new and out of this world?

Anonymous said...

Fabulous commentary, boys. I totally agree with you both.

Anonymous said...

"Tom: Speaking of loopy, deconstructed things...
Lorenzo: Did she even use a needle and a thread?
Tom: No, a loom."



ROFLMAO. You bitches are going straight to hell you know that, right?

Anonymous said...

I might be the only one but I liked the two long Rami dresses. I thought they were pretty and powerfull.

The rest of the clothes were awefull. And did you see the barefott girl walk....Sheesh I thought she was drugged up, stuffed into some dream sequence pajama's and shoved on the runway. Just a friggin disaster.

P.s. I would have loved a prom dress like the ones Rami designed. I had to pay for my own dress and I didn't have much money (it ment saving my birthday money for months) so mine came from T. J. Max. Quell Horror!

Honesty.not.pc.

Anonymous said...

PR4 is on its way, the snark is back, and all is right with the world.

Anonymous said...

I don't like any of this group. The evening gown by Rami is not bad. The red dress is a fugly sack!

Love the commentary T&L! You bitches rock!

Anonymous said...

I agree with everything you guys said (so hilariously), except your comments about Rami's designs. I thought they were gorgeous. Love you, guys :)

Anonymous said...

Actually, what Daniel V. said was that he heard a rumor that Elisa used bee pollen.

Anonymous said...

LOL... you guys are crazy... you were on point with some of the comments but totally off base with others... it was funny to read though...

Unknown said...

Formal Shorts are a hot fashion item where? and those little half gloves?!!!!????? I don't give a crap if they are blessed by the Kaiser they look stupid and are useless.

Anonymous said...

"Kayne, party of one!"

Love ya Kayne, but still *dies*

Bring it, bitches!

Anonymous said...

I really liked Rami's designs.

Anonymous said...

" GothamTomato said...

I agree about the red shorts. From the front, OK. But from the back, they gave the model a hanging bubble butt. And if they did that to a model, they'd completely disappear up the crack of a normal woman.

--Gotham Tomato"


High fashion isn't for the slob and fat woman.

Anonymous said...

Like Victorya's 1st and 3rd dresses. Reminds me of Carolina Herrera lite. I can also appreciate the draping of Rami's dresses.

finding the filth said...

please tell me that simone is the first to go! there is nothing redeeming about her collection. the cheap fabric, the non-design, the terrible colors, and the gloves from 2 seasons ago?!?! it's just mistake after mistake...

i find elisa's designs equally dull. i must be missing something in the photos, cause her collection looks like she's trying to hard to look like she's not trying.

and poor kevin. maybe if they didnt start the show with him...

victorya's red dress was a highlight of the first act. one of the strongest in the show overall.

and rami *sigh*... good but not great. amanda still found a way to sell the black dress during the runway show. but marilinda should never ever ever be put in a floor-length gown. she always ends up looking about 5'2" and 15 lbs too heavy. shes a good model, but if you switched her into the silver mini & put the gown on the other girl, it would have worked better.

Anonymous said...

I love how Simone was obviously the worst from the get-go. Honestly, just awful. I love Jack, despite his very... I don't want to say it, but seemingly limited-to-Neiman Marcus point of view. Seriously, there is something genius about his work, it's just a genius I feel like has already been accomplished in a way. If he pushed himself, he could be the best there hands down.

And I'm sorry, but the next time Rami rips off Alberta Ferretti in a disgustingly boring wannabe-couture fashion, I'm going to file that woman's lawsuit for her. Honestly: he has NO creativity at all.

And Elisa need to stop making clothes out of hemp so she can smoke them afterwards, thankyousoverymuch.

Anonymous said...

Oh and you guys are totally right about Kevin being a "bad" Jeffrey. A REALLY bad Jeffrey. I can't stand his whole "I'm a straight designer, you know, straight designers DO exist, did I mention I'm one of them?"

He seems to have forgotten the champion of the previous season of Project Runway.