Thursday, October 05, 2006 by
Author
Clutch your pearls, ladies! We about fell out from the cornucopia of fashion bitchery on display last night. There's a lot to choose from, but the cage match between the Fashion Valkyrie and the Skinny Weasel was definitely a highlight. Heidi looked about ready to throw down.
"It's quite simple. Even though I acted like I was guilty at the time, I was clearly set up. Evil Bravo people snuck into my room and planted these -- what is it you call them? Pattern books?"
"Oh, are we going there? That's how it's gonna be, is it? You want to talk shit about my crew, bitch? YOU WANNA TALK SHIT ABOUT MY CREW?!"
"Y dart! See? I really do know how to sew, you guys."
"Oh, is Fräulein getting a little uncomfortable? I am so much prettier and talented than everyone else in this room and you know it, Goldilocks.
Sorry, Alison."
"Jesus, what a dickhead."
"Are you kidding me? Get over yourself, princess. So you made a dress out of a sheet. Congratulations. Here's your sewing badge, Campfire Girl.
You couldn't even make a dog collar, du verlogener Drecksack!! You creeped out Miss USA and believe me, those pageant girls are plenty used to getting felt up! "
"Okay, you're spitting on me.
And you're scaring me a little bit."
"Arschloch."
Wasn't that, as Tim would say, "Thrilling?"
As per usual, our girl summed it up better than we could:
84 comments:
absolutely hilarious... and so accurate!!
Oh my god, I'm trying to act like I'm working and reading this DID NOT HELP!!
*dies laughing...internally*
You guys are just too good! I'm just letting the work pile up while I hang out here. I just love it when you speak German!
This is freaking HILARIOUS!!!
I've read it three times already. I can't stop laughing.
Memo to Keith, you need some better excuses. Next time try:
"It wasn't me...it was the one armed man!"
The after show deleted interviews shows Vincent pretty much agrees with him about the producers.
"Yeah, that's the ticket. The producers snuck through the Atlas, dropped off the previously confiscated pattern books in Keith's room, sent Kaynebow in to find them, and in all of the confusion, took my laundry and sent me back fuckin fluff and fold rags. Bastards. Where's my meds!! I'm out of here!!!"
OK, the tiny font "Sorry, Allison" was the spangled beading on this fabulous couture gown of a post.
I had to TiVo this last night, but I cannot WAIT to get home and watch it :-)
I just want to say, off topic, that this is hands down the best blog I've ever found on any subject. I giggle all the time...I'm pretty sure my co-workers think I'm insane.
Almost as good as the actual show! And you know you're bad when Jeffrey thinks you're an asshole.
hee hee! Love it, guys!
Hysterical as always, Boys.
I loved the contempt in Heidi's eyes and you voiced it perfectly in this post.
hahhaha, you guys are hilarious.
Your dialogue is SO much better! Who wouldn't LOVE to see Heidi go completely apeshit on one of these Primadonnas! Especially Keith "conspiracy theory" Michael.
...campfire girl badge :) Hilarious.
I'm glad I'm not the only one who reads this at work and giggles in their cube. I KNOW my co-workers think I'm insane, Kimberly, so don't feel bad :)
~Mel
Interesting that the contract doesn't specifically exclude pattern books. http://popwatch.ew.com/popwatch/ ...ct_runway_.html
just wanted to thank you guys for spacing out your blog so I have something to look forward to while I'm not working at various times throughout the day. What do you gays, I mean guys do for a living anyway besides being fabulous?
Suddenly I'm very afraid of Heidi. The interrogation (though sadly too short-- I suspect there's much more. They should add it to the DVD) was flawless. Her eyes were like gorgeous lasers boring into the abyss where Keith's soul should've been.
PRGays-- Your recap is brilliant (ok, you're spitting on me-- LMAO!) as always!
OMG you guys! This is beyond anything you've come up with before, but one day, you'll top even this!
I loved this confrontation for real but you made it even better! Simply brilliant!
Brian
Hehehehehehe! Hilarious. I waste so much time here laughing at your posts and reading all the comments. I'm not getting any work done.
Darlings, you are 100% fabulous!
I laughed my ass off. You guys are awesome.
on his podcast or something, didn't tim say the reunion taped for 7 HOURS?!?!?
i wish they'd release the whole, sordid spectacle on DVD- - they'd make a fortune.
LOL!
(Although, I believe it's arschloch.)
du verlogener Drecksack!
Your German: I'm on the floor.
aschloch
Your Gerglish: I can't get up.
Last night we saw what must make Heidi a great mom: she has the death-ray stare that will stop any mischief dead in its tracks, and she thinks farts are hilarious.
When the canadian judge gave Laura a ten for the perfectly executed eye roll, all I could think was...well..that will be on Rungay tomorrow...thanks for not letting me down.
As for Keith the LOSER! They gave him his 15:01 second of fame. What a moron. I loved it when the entire cast said "YES, IT'S IN THE CONTRACT".
Thanks for the laugh gents.
Chris from Orlando
Actually, I wasn't really looking forward to the reunion show, and ... I wasn't wrong. I typically don't really like reality TV, but I love love love PROJECT RUNWAY because it's all about talent, and the creative process -- and unlike AMERICAN IDOL, I feel like the contestants really deserve to be there.
This reunion show was much more like typical reality TV -- I was pleased that Allison was so classy -- and what Laura lacked in absolute diplomacy she made up for in spot-on accuracy. Vincent *is* delusional, and Angela's mom *was* difficult, etc.
Can't wait for the finale, and to see everyone's collections.
oh my, how hysterical!!!! this is fabulous, guys. i love it.
but rather than "what a dickhead," which i assume referred to that twit jeffrey, i figured he was thinking "oh shit, i'm busted!" . . . i think jeffrey had a hand in the whole thing.
bravo...brilliant
"Shakespeare's Sister said...
LOL!
(Although, I believe it's arschloch.)"
Vielen Dank, darling. It is indeed Arschloch. Sorry for the typo.
XO
T&L
Just giggling away. Just giggling. I think I love you two.
Okay, so the producers came over the grassy knoll, hooked up with aliens via crop circles and conspired with the voices in Vincent's head to plant those books under Keith's bed?! Now I understand! To quote Jeffrey and the brilliant PRGayboys, what a dickhead!
Wooooohhoohoooo!
this is my favorite kind of PRG post! Yay!
"campfire girl badge". that was priceless.
keith just needs a good spanking.
Anonymous said...
Oh my god, I'm trying to act like I'm working and reading this DID NOT HELP!!
*dies laughing...internally*
I couldn't agree more!
Lovely Laura had some of the BEST facial expressions last night. And her "Serious Ugly" montage was classic--I'm really surprised you boys hadn't put that together first.
But, could Heidi become America's Next Bad Mommy? She was at her fiercest. She was one shnitzel short of going completely "Carrie-at-the-Prom" on both Keith AND Vincent.
Love you boyz!
Although, all things considered, I'd still DO Keith.
Holy shit you guys out did yourselves this time.I have mascara all over my face....
OH and Keith ....we know they planted those books....just like you made 4 outfits for the dog.
Too bad- he was semi hot to me when I first saw him.....now I just see a lying weasel.
Heidi gonna f*** you up.
Geeze, I love you guys.
That picture of Laura said it all.
I was disappointed by the relative paucity of Robert snarkiness, though. Sometimes I prefer to admire the skilled application of a stilleto over the bumbling overkill of a Vincent rant.
I enjoyed the Kayne-o-meter and "Tim's Word of the Day", though.
Mister Terrific
Fashion Valkyrie...I love it!
Though Tim did blow one of his three-dollar words: "circuituous" (what he said) isn't a word, and while "circuitous" (what he meant) is, it doesn't mean what he meant, which is "circular". But he is a superhero anyways.
Kayne's motormouth montage was fantastic, especially when his model cracked up after he left his seat.
I'm a late 50's retail ladies store owner from the south...I thought I lived for PR...I don't...I live for YOUR view of PR!
I could hardly wait to close the store and get home tonight! What ever will I do after this season?!?!?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!! Snort!
Funny!
Keith's a dickhead. To him, lying is easier than breathing. I loved seeing Heidi and Tim duke it out with him.
Top notch material, PRGays!
I loved Laura's facial expressions all through last nights episode. It's great how this woman doesn't hold back. Someone else mentioned that she'd be the perfect head of a fashion house and I have to agree. She's got the class, the money, the life experience, and the moxie! Deep down I was rooting for Michael to win PR (but he got Miss Congeniality and the check - which is cool too), but I really believe that Laura could go places with a win. The world could use some desperately needed class and glam which is a foreign concept to so many, including Jeffrey. Uli is great too though, and she can always maintain her little niche here in Miami.
Just my thoughts.................
Damn! I could have saved myself some time and just read your recap instead of watching the reunion. Great as always, guys!
I'm just glad that Keith was auf'd when he was. I used to work for someone who was a lot like Keith in his capacity to charm and lie so convincingly and effortlessly. The lieing becoms a crutch, a tool and a weapon. It quickly goes from amusing to annoying to very serious. It took people about two weeks of working with my former boss to realize that there was something very seriously wrong with him. If you ever meet anyone like this my advice is to sever all ties with them immediately regardless of the cost.
And Laura thinks Vincent is delusional!!! Keith lives on his own planet. He did everything but blame it on the Democrats.
To Tom in Chicago--I'd do him too--then kick his lying ass to the curb. Why is the really cute ones can never be trusted? LOL
Anonymous to protect the guilty.
Y-dart and the pagent girls getting felt up...price-lessss. I had to read it again and I laughed so hard I cried...again
Oh, and course, I'd do Keith too, but I;d make him pay for his lies...yikes
That was the FUNNIEST thing I have ever read. If only that had been how it actually had happened...lol
Fnarf said...
"Though Tim did blow one of his three-dollar words: "circuituous" (what he said) isn't a word, and while "circuitous" (what he meant) is, it doesn't mean what he meant, which is "circular". But he is a superhero anyways."
I think the spelling was put up by the producers, not Tim. As for his use of the word. . . I'm probalby missing something here, but "circuitous" means circular, winding or indirect - which the ciruclar staircase was, right? Maybe I'm not remembering it correctly, which is possible.
At any rate, Keith - what a liar. If those books were planted there, (sure they were, Keith), then why didn't he say that the night Tim came into his room? If it happened to you, wouldn't you be stating loudly, clearly and unequivocally right then that something was clearly not on the up and up?
Pfui. What a wad.
I truly loved when Michael Kors told Allison that she should have figured out a when to make her recycle dress work - he does it all the time before runway show - nd she basically said: "That may work in your world, but we don't have the time." It aggravates me when the judges don't seem to have an appreciation for the time constraints that the designers are under. That and the lack of available material to "make it work."
is it horrible that I still think that keith is one hot piece of ass and would have liked to ogle him for a couple more episodes? and that I could watch that bad mommy clip for hours?
-gomightyorbots
Ya know, it's kinda cute when a 3 year old claims the dog ate the cookies, even though his face and hands are covered in cookie crumbs. But I agree with an earlier comment, you had better head for the nearest exit when you come across an adult that behaves that way. I hope Keith's friends are listening. There's a big difference between being sympathetic and being manipulated.
I could swear Keith's pants were actually on fire
Shelly said...
I could swear Keith's pants were actually on fire
Well, I don't know about that, Shelly, but I bet his ears have been burning like hell for last 24 hours or so.
translation:
du verlogener Drecksack! = you hypocritical scumbag!
arschloch = asshole
you have to admit though, keith has really nice eyes
Hey, I've slept with a lot of cute jerks, but that doesn't mean I have to like them or even call them back. Keith who?
Keith is still gorgeous. I hope he tries again NEXT YEAR without the books and the excuuuuuuuuuses. He still brought the books, not the producers, so it still goes on him. Keith just come back and try again next year that's all.
Well, ok, he's not exactly the kind of boy you take home to mother, but I bet he's hot in the sack.
"Seth said…
I don't get keith being gorgeous at all. His personality ruins any good looks he may have."
I agree 100%. I really don't get the appeal. Jerks turn me off.
Keith should go to Hollywwod and be an Actor, he's so handsome and he can spin a good tale, he'd be perfect.
He's hot yes.
You guys are so brilliant! Seriously, I was LAUGHING OUT LOUD -- so dead on, so funny, so perfect, so Rungay.
Just when I thought I couldn't love Heidi Klum any more, she turns it out like a total diva and calls both Keith and Vincent on their shit. And unlike Tyra, she doesn't lose her cool and start shouting in the middle of panel -- she just simply points out that Keith is full of shit, Vincent is nuts, and that she and Tim are the Queens of Runway's castle.
Keith better stick to bartending and mooching off his rich boyfriend. He might as well take advantage of his good looks while he still has em (i.e. as a trophy boy).
the little "sorry allison" whisper quote made me spit up!
well done.
I think Keith might want to start looking into Rogaine...
I agree with Christina. Heidi held it together FINE!! Did you notice at the end of the catfight with Keith how he kept trying to talk over her and interrupt and she just kept her cool and kept talking as if he wasn't there? There's more to Ms. Klum than meets the eye.
Heidi is ALL That!
Laura is supreme ruler of the entire universe!
Keith and Vincent are escaped mental patients!
Tim is smarter than anybody else on the show!
Did I miss anything...
Ohh, Tom an' Lorenzo need jobs with Bravo doing this for credit! You guys are the best!
poor Stacy Estrella- but I was thinking the same thing... also, if your name can be translated as STAR in any language? stay away from Project Runway...
Perfection, as usual! Just hysterical.
ROFL. Poor Stacey, at least she had her 5 seconds of fame.
FASHION VALKYRIE!!
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
I love PR, aside from being fabulous it totally cracks me up, and you guys crack me up even more! I WANT TO LIVE IN YOUR BLOG!!!
LOL. Who's Stacey? Was someone there named Stacey?
Awwwww .... Stacey and her Y-Dart assertion. Bless her little heart; girl was just too nice for this show as she didn't have an ounce of snark in her Harvard-educated big brain. I only wish she had called it a coquettish Y-Dart.
Chgo_John said:
Well, I don't know about that, Shelly, but I bet his ears have been burning like hell for last 24 hours or so.
Heh heh. Maybe the saying should be changed to:
Liar liar
Ears on fire
Seth said: His personality ruins any good looks he may have
Agreed. He went from good-looking to beady-eyed creep.
anapestic said: I bet he's hot in the sack.
Someone that self-absorbed probably isn't all that great.
If Keith is straight and still has those eyebrows, he's a terrible lay.
*dies laughing at the Stacy Estrella narrative*
embarrassed to say... I'd FORGOTTEN Stacy altogether. oops!
Loved LOVED your post - couldn't believe Keith's fabrications. However, I'm a teacher (and a mom) - amazing how some people are absolutely unable to admit when they are caught. They always have been 'blamers', and the prognosis isn't good for a change of attitude.
I heart the PR boys!
Oh Keith is sooooooo Hot. Gorgeous Face, why do you think he has the rich boyfriend. Betcha he comes back next year...uh maybe NOT!
LMAO haha
JUST BRILLIANT!
Stacy! Yeah, that was her name. I kept thinking while watching, "What was her name? And how come they didn't let her say more than one thing that night. They didn't get her opinion on anything!" Poor Stacy.
Keith is some serious ugly, as far as I'm concerned - in the looks department AND personality department. To take Vincent's words in reverse, I was feeling like getting off over anything related to Keith. I thought he was a jerk from Day 1.
I have a hard time telling what garments on the show were his independent thoughts and which might have been bolstered by some artificial help (aka. pattern books). Too bad what he did clouds his supposed abilities. I did like that dress for the dog challenge.
It's interesting watching someone single-handedly ruin their own career in front of your eyes.
danke sehr, meine lieblingsknaben (my dear boys). go laura go!
Keith looks like Michael Jackson post-surgeries in the picture captioned "Ok, you're spitting on me." I think that destroys all possibilities of his being considered at all physically attractive.
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