YAWN.
Using the power of bitch, let's see what they're REALLY saying.
Is Bravo Trying to Kill Project Runway? [Gawker]
[Video: Bravotv.com - Screencaps: Project Rungay]
What can the viewers expect of season 5?
Thursday, July 10, 2008 by Author
So, Bravo has continued its brilliant "promoting by not promoting it" approach to Season 5 (hey, it's the talk of the internet) by releasing an incredibly vague video.
YAWN.
Using the power of bitch, let's see what they're REALLY saying.
"I think this year I'm gonna get pregnant again! Meine titsen always look spectacular and I get to eat!"
"I'm so fucking tired. I haven't had a day off in 4 years."
"ELLE MAGAZINE CAN SUCK MY GORGEOUS COLOMBIAN TIT!"
"I think Lifetime is a wonderful opportunity for us to -- what? Oh. Um, it's a really creative group this year. On Bravo."
"Also, I might go back to the bangs again. This mophead look is not the best for me, no?"
"On the other hand, they let me wear PINK this year!"
"Everyone knows that Marie Claire is the nexus point for the fashion world, anyway."
"This isn't for Lifetime? What day is today?"
"I love when I get to stand on the runway in a really short skirt so everyone can see my fraulein bits! That's the BEST."
"You don't think the pink is too much, do you?"
"Lifetime, Bravo. Whatever. If it moves my clothes off the racks, it's all good."
"Anne Slowey is fat."
[Video: Bravotv.com - Screencaps: Project Rungay]
YAWN.
Using the power of bitch, let's see what they're REALLY saying.
[Video: Bravotv.com - Screencaps: Project Rungay]
104 comments:
Thank you, my monitor and keyboard have been thoroughly bathed in latte.
Just when I thought, "maybe I won't watch this season because who wants to be tied to their TV in the summer?" I now HAVE to just for your commentary. Weinstein owes you boys some DOUGH.
I heart you TLo.
can't. stop. giggling!!!!
This is why I love you guys!!!! So much snarky fun.
OHMYGOD OHMYGOD OHMYGOD I can't stop laughing. You bitches are THE BEST!!!
"ELLE MAGAZINE CAN SUCK MY GORGEOUS COLOMBIAN TIT!"
ROFLMAO.
Freaking hilarious, boys!
A+, boys!
Aww, never stop doing your screencap commentary, guys. I love it!!!!
lemniscus said...
Just when I thought, "maybe I won't watch this season because who wants to be tied to their TV in the summer?" I now HAVE to just for your commentary. Weinstein owes you boys some DOUGH.
DITTO. Bravo, Lifetime, Weistein whoever should kiss your fabulous and hilarious asses.
Hahahahahahaha. Fabulous, gentleman, simply fabulous.
At this point, if it wasn't for PRG I'm not so sure if I'd be watching this show anymore.
Love you bitches!!!
Screencap + "I'm so fucking tired. I haven't had a day off in 4 years."
=
Priceless.
Hee! So funny. The only interesting part in that whole interview was Nina saying that it'd be more punk and edgier. Which duh, after only "innovation" is awarded, of course you're going to get that style more.
Do you boys live in their minds? I thought you had a fab place in Philly!
Oh fabulous! Thanks, guys, you are the gift that keeps on giving. Hilarious!
LMFAO! you two are the best!
how many times can they use the word "diversity"? it sounds so desperate.
Oh, there's a new post! And screencaps! Why do you guys even have to work? Can't you just do this all day? Please?
You define fabulosity. Like so many others, I am only planning to watch this because of you.
So many funny lines, but this one is my favorite:
"I'm so fucking tired. I haven't had a day off in 4 years."
Love you boys!!!!!!!
Fucking hilarious!
LOL. Everybody is wondering why I'm laughing so hard. LOL.
The Tim & Heidi commentary are the BEST! And in all likelihood, 100% spot on!
Oh, and I agree totally agree with everyone posting that you guys are probably the only reason viewers will tune in for what looks like PR's last hurrah.
- edina -
BWAHHAHAHAHAHAH!
AWESOME!!! FRIGGING HILARIOUS!!!!
"I'm so fucking tired. I haven't had a day off in 4 years."
and it shows!!! yesterday I was watching the finale of season 1 and Tim looked sooooo young!!!! I was shocked.... what year was season 1 anyway?
Oh, you boys always come through with your Nina screencaps! I remember why I fell in love with your site in the first place!
And smiling about the "Haven't had a day off in 4 years" bit too.
If I had mountains of disposable income I'd give a majority of it to you bitches, because you're better than movies & tv combined!
"Anne Slowey is fat."
--best one.
"Unless my viscera betrays me" ???
Did I hear right, did TG really say that, or has my viscera betrayed me?
I think the most honest moment was when TG said, "I'm overwhelmed!" -- they all sound quite brain dead, like they sat them down at the end of several very long days, stuck mics in front of them, and said, "Quick, whaddya think of the new season, huh?!"
Love the captions, boys.
Ann Slowey is fat.
Tee hee.
You GUYS!!! Listen, PR should put you on the payroll. You are what's keeping us interested in the whole hot mess.
too effing funny!
oh the bitchery! oh the camp!
if only Season 5 had THIS much FUN to look forward to!
but wait. we have NO IDEA what to look forward cuz there is BARELY ANY promo!
It's a strange silence that I am utterly uncomfortable with.
I just have this sinking feeling that this season will be a complete NUTJOB - and NOT in a good way.....sigh.
Hilarious! Now I can't wait for season 5 : )
Gee, i hope there's some diversity in the this round's contestants. Sounds like they've got everything BUT diversity going for them.
....No wait, just rewatched the spot and i was wrong: they seem to ONLY have diversity.
Christian is very very talented! I see a lot of opportunity for "PPS". He has been a success, as a personality! It is still to be seen if he will succeed as a fashion designer, have a successful label, and reach the level of his mentors (McQueen/Westwood). I sincerely wish him all the best he is so talented! I think it is premature to call him a success! It puts far too much pressure on him prior to launching his first independent collection.
BTW you two are Hilarious!!!
This is hilarious, guys! Giggling here.
Anonymous said...
Christian is very very talented! I see a lot of opportunity for "PPS". He has been a success, as a personality! It is still to be seen if he will succeed as a fashion designer, have a successful label, and reach the level of his mentors (McQueen/Westwood). I sincerely wish him all the best he is so talented! I think it is premature to call him a success! It puts far too much pressure on him prior to launching his first independent collection.
I had the same reaction when I heard Nina saying that. It's way too early to call him a success story.
That is so effing funny. I think I love your blog more than the show itself.
I cannot wait for the new season, just so I can read your recaps.
Soooooo funny!!!!
You poodles made my day. This is really funny and I'm having a shitty day at work.
THE BITCH IS ON!!!!!!!!!!!
Didn't even bother to watch the video - your screencaps are assuredly more entertaining and truthful.
TLo, this is some of your best work ever! You two should edit PR.
After seeing that video, my viscera says Season 5 is going to be a punk freak show.
Well, since my computer at work has no sound i won't be able to watch the video version until i get home, but who needs it anyway? your screencaps are MUCH, Much more entertaining... thanks for the morning bright spot!
Oh dear God, but that was funny. I didn't bother to view the "genuine version" - why bother when I have yours?!
I know I'm but one of the admiring crowd, but I adore you two.
ALL the best, (which is what you do, consistently)
NDC
Nina's last screen capture and quote have me laughing out loud!
Inspired!
Now THAT's what I'm talking about!
Tlo's back on their A-game! let the mother effin' season begin!
Freak show!
Bitchin' moanin' and cryin' to beat the band.
Could be funnish.
-- desertwind
LMAO!! Thanks so much for brightening an otherwise suck ass day at work!
LOL!!
so funny....thanks you two!!
Punk freakshow could be fun, but it could be a whole show full of Jeffreys. Oy. Only the gayboys could keep me watching at that point.
Listening to the video while reading the screnecaps:
BLAH BLAH BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH
meine titsen
BLAH BLAH BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH
"I'm so fucking tired."
BLAH BLAH BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH
"Gorgeous Columbian tit"
BLAH BLAH BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH
"This is for Lifetime?"
BLAH BLAH BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH
"Fraulein bits"
BLAH BLAH BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH
"Ann Slowey is fat"
OMFG!!!
Lifetime...Bravo...whatever. Just keep it comin'.
The best part of a reeeaaalllyyy bad day!
SisterZip
Seriously cannot quit laughing at the Tim/tired screencap. Priceless!
That last comment was the best thing you guys have ever done! I still can't stop laughing. Despite the fact that my laptop will forever smell of cranberry juice, which is definitely not funny.
<3 Sam
Love your interpretations.
But what the heck is with the flipping the screens? The red bolt of fabric at eye level and the shorter, thicker lime green are on the right side and then on the left side and ....repeat til vertigo sets in.
Or do the stars have a "You must photograph me from my right side" clause in their contracts?
Spectacular commentary!
I love the Michael Kors comments.
And Nina's last comment is too funny!
Oh you guys...
Great post, guys; A+
I have a conspiracy theory that I haven't heard anyone float by yet. They won't show the new cast, they won't show any new designs, they're focusing ads on contestants from past seasons, there's been talk of revisiting challenges from past episodes, and in this latest promo they seem to be talking around the new season rather than about it.
My theory: they're going to spring an All-Stars season on us.
After an absolutely craptastic past couple o'days, the two posts from you boys today(here and TLO) have been sunbursts!
Many, many thanks, and keep 'em coming.
XOXO
American Idol has managed an Oscar-winner, some grammy-winners, and assorted drama queens on Broadway stages and the like. PR has managed exactly...what in the end with its winners? PUSHING Christian on us as if no one realizes what it takes to be a real successful designer (i.e. McQueen doesn't look so much like some designer who inspired him, Christian does too much) and having one real serious refusal in the creative off-tangent of Jay-who-never-updates-his-blog...
Meh, it's just not clear WHAT they want, and that is not desire, that's just middle-of-the-road caution...
Funniest Shit. EVAR!
You bitches are so funny you're scary.
HEAVENLY!
Fabulous screencaps!!
GO TLO!!
This is why we all watch, no?
OMG!!! The laughter builds with each of your hilarious screencaps until we find out "Ann Slowey is fat"!!!! I went from a petite giggle to an all out, rolling on the floor, tears flowing freely fit of manic laughter!!!
Thanks to you, Tlo, I am now the teeniest bit excited about Season 5!!!
----StkrShock
Loved the part about "fraulein bits", but my favorite faux German phrase for that is "schmutz platzchen"!
You guys almost made me spit out my iced tea. Priceless!
That was awesome. Reading you guys is better than watching the actual show.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Thanks for that boys! I've been having a shit week, and that just MADE IT!
I love you!
I loved the Season 4 contestants so much... for me the only way they could top Season 4 would be if all the contestants were hot gay porn stars who would never wear shirts for the duration of the competition... and they only designed clothes for male models.
Keep that in mind, Bravo, if you need an idea for a killer new show.
WHAT THE F*** IS BRAVO WAITING FOR?
(for project runway to come back? ain't gonna happen!)
GIVE TLO THEIR OWN SHOW!!!
(Jo & Slade? Seriously? Come on...)
"ELLE MAGAZINE CAN SUCK MY GORGEOUS COLOMBIAN TIT!"
Hilarious!
Suddenly I don't care where the show winds up, as long as you 2 provide the snark , it's all good!
Touche', mes amis! I agree with Doug (he just beat me to it to get it on here). I am strongly thinking that it's going to be some sort of all-star type season, where everyone (except Daniel Franco, hopefully, 'cause he's done it already) have a second chance. If you take a few personalities from each group, you could definitely have a very diverse group. And with the ads? Yeah, it has to be something like that.
That was one of the best screen-cap convos I have ever seen. Nina's tit comment was the best. xD LOL
I bet you're right about Tim Gunn not having a day off... :/
I'm still giggling! I don't think I'm going to watch Season 5; I think I'm just going to read Project Rungay since that will be loads much more fun!
That Mood backdrop is so weird.
I just got a flash:
Maybe they didn't film this season in New York!
There were never any "Tim spotted at Mood with a group of designers" or "Rucker spotted driving a group of freaks around town" rumors, were there?
Maybe they took the freaks to Paris. That'd be too expensive wouldn't it?
Maybe they shot it in L.A. -- Ha! That'd be funny.
Hmmmmm. Back to my nap. Jesus, it's hot today.
-- desertwind
BEST POST EVER. Well, it's up there at least. *giggles uncontrollably*
Also, I think I'm going to have to make an icon with those screencaps for the new season - properly credited/linked back of course. =D
Oh, my god! The Anne Slowey comment was so evil! I've read her food journal from fashion week. gah!
What is up with the diversity, diversity, diversity comments. And then what worries me is the "big personalities" comment and the "look for lots of drama". I don't watch it for that much drama. I am afraid. But if nothing else I will get to read your reviews and laugh.
TLo,
Thank you for making me laugh so hard my sides ache! I havent laughed that well in ages!
Love, Love, Love!
tlo its about time you fabulous bitches. you boys haven't done improv in a while.
Perfect.
Kzspot
oh god -- that was priceless!
thanks for the laughs!
xoxoxo
Please do more of these screencaps. You guys are hilarious.
And I couldn't help but notice how stiff Heidi's hair looks. Too much Tresemme, I guess.
"I love when I get to stand on the runway in a really short skirt so everyone can see my fraulein bits! That's the BEST."
I've always thought the same! And have imagined the contestants saying in their minds, "keep your eyes on her face, keep your eyes on her face, keep your eyes on her face."
I just read it again out loud to my husband!!
We were laughing so hard one of the kids woke up!!
Anne Slowey is fat.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
After having been down this past week, reading this post has made me soo happy :) LOVE the screencaps on Nina and Tim, and Heidi's "fraulein bits"..so true! haha
Trust TLo to find the subtext.
No matter where I work, I surf PRGay and end up snickering and chortling as I do. My coworkers always think I'm a nutcase.
Okay, they would anyway, but this just gives them rock solid evidence.
You guys saved S4 for me. I rely on you to do the same if S5 is a tanker, too.
I think I have stumbled on a way to rescue PR5; Woody Allens's 1966 classic What's Up Tiger Lilly. Allen took a grade B Japanese spy movie and added a hysterically funny new soundtrack making the plot the quest for the worlds best egg salad recipe.
Fast forward to 2008, Tom and Lorenzo sitting comfortably in their swanky Philadelphia townhouse watching PR5 and a speedy typist doing a simultaneous translation of their snarks and imagined dialogue into subtitles! We get to watch PR5 with simultaneous humor from T&Lo! Now how do I get to pitch this to the producers???
If Heidi has titsen, shouldn't she too have "bitsen?" ;-)
Poor Tim looks spent. Probably from being forced to tape that show with the grating and tasteless Gretta Monahan. I can't wait for y'all to savage the new rendition. Veronica Webb will look like Baby Jesus next to her replacement.
Go Nina! At least you don't have an eating disorder like other bitches who shall be remain nameless....
One of the funniest things I've read in a long time, boys!
LOL. My tummy aches because of too much laughter! LOL Okay, please give me a minute to compose myself... Whew!
LOVE!
OMG! I just laughed out loud at my desk while making a phone call. Thank you for the bright spot in my day!
So fucking funny!!!!!!
Hilarious! Bravo for dealing with it so wonderfully.
Hahahahaha. That's why I love you guys. Please have at least one of these every episode of Season 5 (and Alex's illustrations). Nobody does them the way you both do. I love them!!!
Claaaaaaaaaaasic!!
I just cannot wait for S5!!
MORE SCREEN CAPS!!
Hi guys,
I'm a fan of the show and my friend sent me the link. This is hilarious! I can't stop laughing.
"I'm so fucking tired. I haven't had a day off in 4 years."
Tears running down my cheeks, my stomach hurts and I can't get the image of outta my mind!
"Anne Slowey is fat."
Hahahahahaha. Just the laugh I needed on my blah Friday afternoon.
"I love when I get to stand on the runway in a really short skirt so everyone can see my fraulein bits! That's the BEST."
Ha! Even my husband said something along those lines. Hilarious, guys, and thank you so much for everything you do.
Stubenville said...
I think I have stumbled on a way to rescue PR5; Woody Allens's 1966 classic What's Up Tiger Lilly. Allen took a grade B Japanese spy movie and added a hysterically funny new soundtrack making the plot the quest for the worlds best egg salad recipe.
Fast forward to 2008, Tom and Lorenzo sitting comfortably in their swanky Philadelphia townhouse watching PR5 and a speedy typist doing a simultaneous translation of their snarks and imagined dialogue into subtitles! We get to watch PR5 with simultaneous humor from T&Lo! Now how do I get to pitch this to the producers???
BRILLIANT IDEA! (Also see Mystery Science Theatre 3000) This combines TLo's stinging wits with their screencap artistry.
No matter how the upcoming season sucks we have you two to keep it real...hilarious. Bless you boys!
Hahahahahahahaha! Snort!
Oh god, just what I need when I'm packing up from vacation and heading home. Thank you!!!!
I can't wait for season 5 and so soon after season 4 ended. Excited!
HI - FREAKING - LARIOUS!
This is what I miss the MOST about an actual PR season - SCREEN CAPS!
Been out of the country - limited internet access - glad to be back!
profp
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