Miami Nice

Monday, October 16, 2006 by


We've about had it with Uli. Do you all have any idea how hard it is to be bitchy about someone who's so sweet?



We wanted to see her and Tim get vasted! We thought her apartment would be nothing but ashtrays full of roaches and empty Captain Morgan bottles. Instead, it was like watching a sorority girl take her father on a tour of the campus.


Look at her! Adorable! What can we possibly say about her?

Bitch.

Tim honey, take the jacket off more often.

But leave the shoes on. Those dogs are blinding.



That sound you hear is the sizzling of skin cells.


Oh, that's it. Living in the cold, colorless world of East Germany, dreaming of the future by watching "Miami Vice" episodes? You have gone too far, Fräulein! Tell us you hate Laura, tell us you're an alcoholic, hell, tell us you shot a man in Reno just to watch him die - anything!


We need our insulin shots now.

Looks like she went to the Vincent Libretti School of Hat Design.

83 comments:

Anonymous said...

You guys are my sunshine every day.

Thank you.

BigAssBelle said...

all of us german girls are noted for our sweetness ;-)

she is a peach, though, isn't she?

Anonymous said...

Looks like she went to the Vincent Libretti School of Hat Design

Bahahahahaa....so awesome!

Gigi said...

She's just darling, isn't she? It's pretty obvious that Tim's feet never see the light of day, lol! His skin will never be the same after being exposed to our blistering sun!

junior_goddess said...

What's to say---she's lucky AND hard working. It paid off!

Anonymous said...

I've been reading this all season, and you guys never ceese to make me laugh.

Uli is so sweet. I feel bad for not wanting her to win. Do something bitchy Uli!

Bill said...

"Looks like she went to the Vincent Libretti School of Hat Design."

Perfect! You guys destroy me. Great start to me Monday.

Anonymous said...

Can somebody post the PR BOYS email address since the link isnt working for me??? I have a photo to share of Laura's work. Thanks

TLo said...


Anonymous said...

Can somebody post the PR BOYS email address since the link isnt working for me??? I have a photo to share of Laura's work. Thanks"


Hi anonymous,

Here it is:
theprgayboys@gmail.com

Thanks.
T&L

Anonymous said...

Blah, blah, blah. Yes, she's a packet of Equal, but seriously boys, you're missing the big white elephant standing in front of you....two words...HER HAIR???? YIKES. She needs to visit the Tresseme Salon mach schnell!!

Davy said...

I thought Uli had more personality in this episode than she had all season long. I loved her East Germany/Miami Vice story. NOW we know why she ended up there.

Anonymous said...

I loved her East Germany/Miami Vice story.

Me, too. I wish we'd learned more about Uli during the season. Until the last episode, I only knew that she loved prints (and was great with them) and that she liked to party.

Loved your recap of Tim's visit with Uli, PRGayBoys. As damaris said, you guys are sunshine.

Unknown said...

redheadgirl - If we're going to dis anyone's hair, would Uli really be your first choice? Jeffrey looks like he lets his toddler cut his hair. With a weed-wacker. Please.

DolceLorenzo said...

"Looks like she went to the Vincent Libretti School of Hat Design."

Hilarious. Great post, guys.

And guys, can we leave this post/comment section Jeffrey-free? Please.

Anonymous said...

I don't like Jeffrey's hair either, but at least it is a style (albeit not mine).

Suzanne said...

OMG That last line killed me.

Does anyone else wish that once, just once, the Tresemme people would tie Uli up and give her the blow out of death? Love you Uli, but enough with the pony tail!

And for anyone who was drooling over Laura's place, Uli's chunk of real estate ain't no joke either.

Suzanne said...

LOL redheadgirl, I posted before I even read your comment.

Word.

Anonymous said...

I think Uli will win PR. I hope that she will then get a real 'do! Her lack of a hairstyle drives me nuts. What's with the big hair barret? Wore that in 5th grade.

Other than that she's fab.

James Derek Dwyer said...

Vincent Libretti School of Hat Design has a great scholarship program...

Red Seven said...

Like Tim, I was surprised to hear that Uli had grown up in East Germany -- that certainly adds a spin to her story that wasn't there for me before, and makes her that much more adorable. If she wins, you can't feel bad -- no matter who else you might be pulling for.

Kitty said...

This whole episode made me appreciate all four finalists a million times more.

I'm rooting for Michael, but now I'll feel good about any of them winning.

Anonymous said...

She’s our little sugarplum strudel girl...from the Black Forest....

come into ze house....little boy...

"Hansel, stick out your finger, so I can feel if you are fat yet."

Anonymous said...

If I had to wear the suit Tim was wearing on the beaches of Miami, I'd probably faint from heatstroke, and Tim didn't even break a sweat. Unbelieveable!

In my opinion, Uli's "bone" motif is yawnsville.

Anonymous said...

I loved Uli's collection. I think she's very talented. Her place is nice and the view outside her window is breathtaking. America is a good place, ja?

Anonymous said...

ANOTHER wonderful post. The "dogs", the "hat" ref.....you guys are just WAY too good at what you do.
Mega-kudos.

Anonymous said...

I got a "Nixon on the beach in pinstripes and wingtips" vibe from Tim. Darling, it's Miami - lighten up a little. While I can't for a minute imagine Tim in shorts perhaps he should have gone for a lighter-colored suit. And sunglasses. Prescription sunglasses.

Loved Uli's story. I totally get her whole esthetic now. I don't want to wear it but I get it.

Anonymous said...

On Tim's podcast, he talked about Uli being really alone, with no one to talk to -- unlike the other designers. You could hear how taken he was with her situation.

This episode helped me to understand where she was coming from. I actually could see myself buying a few of her pieces.

If Uli wins, I would not be unhappy.

Anonymous said...

Libretti School of Hat Design...HA! Wonderful.

Anonymous said...

Finding out that she was from East Germany explained the undercurrent in her personality. Everyone I have ever known who got out from behind the Iron Curtain has that same quiet, stand-offish, non-direct competitiveness kind of thing underneath.

It's an ingrained fear that comes from living in a culture where you never know who among you is an informer for the secret police. I don't think it ever leaves a person no matter how long they've been here.

--Gotham Tomato

BigAssBelle said...

"It's an ingrained fear that comes from living in a culture where you never know who among you is an informer for the secret police. I don't think it ever leaves a person no matter how long they've been here."

How awful for Uli that she may soon be living with the same fears in this country . . .

Anonymous said...

"Shot a man in Reno just to watch him die." ROTFLMAO

Alex said...

But leave the shoes on. Those dogs are blinding.

I'm telling you, it looked as though he was kicking around some flour. 'Dito!

Unknown said...

I friggin' love Uli. :)

Lisette said...

She is the sweetest. I agree with whomever said that this episode made them more receptive to all the designers Seeing them with their families or in Uli's case her element really changed how I see them and they became less caricatures. I like Laura's aesthetic the best but frankly don't know who I would pick if it were up to me.

Kate said...

Look at that closeup picture of Tim...you can see the red line across his neck. He may not be the Whitest Man in America, but he HAS to be the palest.

Another fab post. How do they do it?

Anonymous said...

I totally love Uli and she's my pick to win. And she's sweet, but I'm thinking she's also kinda teflon because she is the one who STOLE NAZRI from Michael. How soon we forget. Don't get me wrong, she had every right, but people were ready to string up Zulema for the same thing in S2.

The bitch came out, but no one cared enough to remember.

Love Uli, Love PRGays!

Anonymous said...

BigAssBelle: "It's an ingrained fear that comes from living in a culture where you never know who among you is an informer for the secret police. I don't think it ever leaves a person no matter how long they've been here." How awful for Uli that she may soon be living with the same fears in this country . . .

What? Are the Dems going to take Congress? I did hear that they would be making it illegal to question global warming...
[How about we keep this a fashion blog and get away from politics?]

Anonymous said...

How awful for Uli that she may soon be living with the same fears in this country . . .

Yeesh! If you'd think there was one place without political interjection..it would be here

Anonymous said...

Uli love your clothes. Now, dayuum girl, fix that hairdo. You are too pretty to have stringy locks. Aren't there any top notch hair stylists in Miami?

Anonymous said...

I just hope that Tim was wearing socks that day.

Chgo_John said...

Barblog said...
"Aren't there any top notch hair stylists in Miami?"

My dear Barblog, South Beach is lousy with 'em. ;)

Anonymous said...

My stylist said he would love to get Uli in his chair. He says she has great potential. I think she does too. The right hair and make-up and Ms. Uli would be HAWT!

katiecoo said...

OMG...you got me with the Reno comment...dyin ovah heyah. LMAO at the hat too. hahaha

I think Uli might win. How could this entry not make her smile?

I hope Tim was wearing sunscreen! :horrors:

Anonymous said...

She's a sweetheart. She's a ray of sunshine. I always liked ULI.

Anonymous said...

She's one of two designers I'd like to drink with...I want to sit next to Laura at a cocktail party and trade quips, but Uli? I want to go club-hopping until the sun comes out! We'll get vasted together! Then probably pass out under a palm tree on the beach.

Anonymous said...

Uli is just a wonderful person. She has survived a lot, I admire her. She seemed so happy living in Miami. She won't be lonely for long. There is a very nice German Restaurant Bar on the Beach, it's fun to sit at and look at the ocean, maybe she can find some friends and people to talk to eventually. I can totally see her already shooting a layout for "OCEAN" and "SOUTHBEACH" Magazines. She's a sweetie.

Gidget Bananas said...

I *heart* Uli.

She's also one of the reasons I wish the producers focused a little more on the quieter designers, too. They obviously have stories to tell -- that's why they were chosen -- give them some screen time, dang it!

Anonymous said...

I'm not a fan of Uli but I do like her collection the best. Plus I don't think at this point with all the BULLSHIT that's gone on since last Wednesday, that I'd want Jeffrey OR Laura to win. If only so that all the nuts posting on the blogspots will foam at the mouth.

Anonymous said...

Well, we know she's a manipulative bitch who hates ANgela, we just can't prove it. Maybe at Bryant Park she'll say something like, "I'm so glad I beat Angela! Bonnie's bad outfit wasn't my fault, cause I had imunity bitches! Now enjoy the show."

Anonymous said...

"Well, we know she's a manipulative bitch who hates ANgela, we just can't prove it."

Uli is kind of shifty and shady, isn't she? Very passive-agressive. Then again, Angela was a pain in the ass so I can understand the sentiment

-TurtlePoop

Anonymous said...

She's probably sewing for the pink-team,biker chic sweetie..I think so anyway. She's lovely.

Anonymous said...

"Uli is kind of shifty and shady, isn't she? Very passive-agressive. Then again, Angela was a pain in the ass so I can understand the sentiment"



Yeah, that remark from Uli, about Angela, made me not like her so much, and made me think that if I saw more of her that I wouldn't like her much.

I've actually met Angela twice & she is a VERY nice, sweet, terrific person. And you can see in her why the types who think that they are just too, too cool would pick on her. She is just a nice person, with no fake veneer there.

I think the 'Lord of the Flies' mentality present in this season's group of designers is what caused her troubles (and quite unfairly). They really have acted like a bunch of 7th graders this season. (And BTW, if you watch the bonus footage on the Bravo site, you see that while she was blamed for breaking the sewing machines in that one episode, it was actually Bradley who moved from machine to machine- while he was alone in the room- and broke the machines.)

I have also seen Angela hanging out, having a grand old time with season 2 designers (the nice ones, Nick & Chloe). So she's keeping some better company now.

--Gotham Tomato

Anonymous said...

loved this post (as I love all you post)
Miami Nice!
HA

Anonymous said...

You could say that she doesn't know how to dress herself! Such a pretty face and body but she wears the weirest clothing. Doesn't she know that she's going to be filmed!?!? It boggles the mind... you're on TV... dress up! :)

Anonymous said...

"Jeffrey looks like he lets his toddler cut his hair. With a weed-wacker. Please."

I've always thought that Jeffrey looks like he needs a decent bath and a good hair washing. But, honestly, I think that is the look he is going for and many people really like it.

Uli is very pretty, but with a little hair and make-up she could be beautiful. Not that I can't appreciate a more natural look though.

Anonymous said...

It's easy to see that ULI is one of the ladies who likes
"no lipstick" , no hair, no makeup...kinda like ELLEN if you catch my drift. So just let her be... I do love ULI, I'm just saying...you know..I lived in South Beach I can spot the no-lipstick "girls" with my gaydar.

Anonymous said...

...Are you saying she's a big lez, anonymous?

It's Project RunGAY. Just come out and say it. Besides, I doubt Uli's lurking here, ready to pounce with a pack of lawyers.

Anonymous said...

Considering Der Liebling's usurping of Nazri from Michael, her remarks and actions towards Angela and her passive/aggressive, shifty announcement of Laura's "announcement", maybe the secret police informant is the Project Runway contestant. Did she get out of East Germany before the Wall fell? Only "preferred citizens" got to do that...

Anonymous said...

Tim's alabaster white toesies are sooo de rigeur!

Anonymous said...

Tim's feet make me hurt.

Anonymous said...

Oh, dear. I didn't know I was gay. I'm Dutch and wear my blonde hair straight. I also schlep around in shorts and a tee-shirt with no makeup, and totally admire Uli's personal style. What you see is what you get, MEN--cute and natural. Oh, and we're ready to go out the door in five minutes.

Anonymous said...

AMEN. I have blonde hair, blue eyes, and almost the same build as Uli. I don't wear make-up or get all dressy with my hair and I'm not a lesbian.

LET'S NOT BEGIN THE SHALLOW STEREOTYPING PLEASE.

bungle said...

Oh good, we're doing politics in this one? Ok!


My take: I bet Uli could manage to make a dress out of miniature flags of every country on the planet and in the high fashion arean she'd still pull it off somehow.

She's amazing. She won a fashion challenge with tie-dye fer cryin' out loud... I don't know much but my first guess wouldn't be to use that kind of thing to impress fashionistas.

The Scarlett said...

Loved the Reno thing!

Oh, and on the 'High Flying Fashion' episode I was DYING for Uli to get a makeover. I think Collier Strong/Nathaniel Hawkins spent all of their time on Laura and Angela. Could someone hide Uli's hair clip?

Anonymous said...

Aww I love the Uli-schnitzel! I don't know about any of yall, but I would have LOVED to see Tim strolling down Miami beach in some snazzy Bermuda shorts instead of that suit...Oh, and the Johnny Cash reference gave you two major cool points. <3

Anonymous said...

More proof that Tim Gunn is the whitest man on earth!

Mel said...

OMG You guys crack me up!!! "shot a man in reno just to watch him die" hahhahahhahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fnarf said...

The waistline of Tim's pants fills me -- a straight man, mind you -- with mindless, unthinking rage and self-loathing. WHY CAN'T I BE FABULOUS TOO???

And Uli? Uli's hot. Such a doll. Captain Morgan, never; she's an ineffably graceful wine drinker.

Anonymous said...

It was kind of hinted Uli might be, but watch you'll see. It does not matter either way, she is a cutie. I'm from South Beach, I know whaaaat's uppppppp!!!

Anonymous said...

Lighten up Amie. This is a FUN place. And besides, shallow stereotypes are so much fun!!! Just kidding....

Anonymous said...

I never trust a woman who doesn't wear lipstick, which is probably why I love Laura, she smacks on the red every now and then.
Women who don't wear lipstick.."turn me off"

love
...Vincent....


just kidding!

Anonymous said...

"Wow" to the Anonymous who somehow managaed to slip in a Nazi reference in there. Jesus... lets be a little less unsensitive, shall we?

-The Jewish Broad from Bonhoffer

Anonymous said...

I loved Uli's collection the best. I really was taken with it. I want practically all of it especially the silver pieces. It also seems a lot of people who were there liked her clothes the best so I can't wait for Wed. to see the clothes in motion. and yes I also have been hoping she fixes her hair!! she didnt even fix it for Bryant Park. Gabriella

Anonymous said...

Day at the beach, hard at work, Olympus Fashion Week. Uli's hair is keepin' it real.

Anonymous said...

Love the reference to the Late, Great Johnny Cash! LOL! This is one of the funniest "blogspots" out there on the "Interweb."

Anonymous said...

How come none of your screengrabs have the Bravo bug on them?

TLo said...

"mickey-d said…

How come none of your screengrabs have the Bravo bug on them?"


Hi Mickey-d,

We download the episode from iTunes and that doesn't have the Bravo logo.

T&L

Stephanie Hammer said...

ulli is east german and you really DID have to make your own clothes there, and the shopping situ was DIRE, believe you me (i lived there -- and spent 2 weeks trying to buy an umbrella for a friend... yikes -- i couldnt' FIND an umbrella for sale -- imagine: no totes!). on the other hand, the east germans were far and away the nicest coolest people i ever met in europe, and i continually meet em in the us and realize hey, they have to be east germans because they are so so nice. it's for real, so deal. ich liebe dich sehr viel ulli!

Alex said...

I've never gotten a lesbian vibe from Uli before, but now that I think about it, I guess it could be possible. Well, anything's possible. Aime is right, on the one hand, that stereotypes are largely meaningless when applied to one individual; we all know "butch" straight women, fey straight men, and I know plenty of gay people of both genders who don't fit any of the stereotypes.

That said, if Uli is gay, and Michael, too, it's sad that in this day and age, and on THIS show, they choose to hide it or not be 100% open about it. Even Jeffrey is upfront about being bi (or at least coy about defining himself as strictly hetero). As a gay male, I commend Kayne and Robert for being open about their sexuality, but lets face it: it's not like they could fool anyone. It would be nice if some who don't so easily fit the stereotypes would come out proudly. That would really set Middle America on its ear. Makes me think of all those polls of people who claim they don't know any gay people...they just don't know any people who look/act/dress like Carson Kressley or Rosie O'Donnell, and can't even fathom that gay people exist who don't fit the stereotypes.

Anonymous said...

"That said, if Uli is gay, and Michael, too, it's sad that in this day and age, and on THIS show, they choose to hide it or not be 100% open about it."

They may not be hiding it at all. Remember Zulema was openly gay, but the producers decided it didn't fit with the "image" of her they wanted to project, so they cut all references to her sexuality.

Anonymous said...

i think uli looks like a poor man's cameron diaz... she could definitely use a makeover...

Anonymous said...

"i think uli looks like a poor man's cameron diaz... she could definitely use a makeover..."

Frankly, I think Uli looks fabulous. She has such confidence in herself that she proudly faces the world sans makeup. No surprises there and no caked up gook hiding so-called skin or feature flaws.

Uli has a fantastically toned figure, wonderful sun-kissed skin, more talent in her little finger than most of us, and great genes. I'm willing to bet she'll age as gracefully as her beautiful mother, Heidi.

I agree with bigassbelle: She is a peach

Anonymous said...

"But leave the shoes on. Those dogs are blinding."

Haven't you heard?? PALE is the new TAN.... Tim is just way ahead of the rest of us!