The Tom & Lorenzo Archives: 2006 -2011
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Virgins v. Vixens

Oh, you bitches. You dirty, dirty bitches. We kept our mouths shut over the Jane Fonda thing, but we cannot remain silent anymore.

ANGIE DICKINSON IS DEAD.

How COULD you? Sure, we all love Natalie Wood, but against a hardcore broad like Angie? Seriously?

Well, fine. See how you like it this time when we send her up against a goddamn LEGEND. She's got her work cut out for her this week!

MISS NATALIE WOOD


VS.


The former Mary Frances Reynolds,


MISS DEBBIE REYNOLDS.

There. Happy now?


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178 comments:

Gotta go with Debbie.


Debbie.


You dirty, dirty bastards.

Debbie.


DEBBIE. No contest.


Debs, all the way.


Uh-oh. It's looking like a landslide already...

I'll go with Natalie. Just for grins.


Carrie Fisher's mom all the way! (At least until she comes head to head with Doris Day for top virgin.)


It's gotta be Debbie this time.


C'est moi, c'est moi Lola

I know I'll be in the minority on this one, but Natalya, again.

Yes, I know the whole Eddie Fisher/Liz Taylor story and that she danced until her feet bled. (Also kudos for helping make Carrie Fisher the sardonic bitch she is.) But I've never been a fan.

Oh well, Natalie had a good run. Sorry about Angie.


Debbie, obviously.


Debbie!


Karen in Ohio

Natalie is dead to me.

Debbie.


Debbie. You bastards.


To against the grain again (I picked Angie last time), Natalie!


you dirty bitches...

I have to go with Debs


I refuse to participate in any contest that unjustly awarded Natalie over Angie.

I'm on strike, you can all shove it.


a third laura

DEBBIE. Watch her breakout role in Singin' in the Rain or her gutsy ascent from tomboy to celebrity in the Unsinkable Molly Brown!
You boys should watch the latter musical.
Girl could do it all!


Aahh, I don't usually vote in these things but I gotta say

DEBBIE!

"Singing in the Rain" remains one of my favorite films. Plus I almost got to meet her in the late 90s. I work in advertising and one of our clients was toying with the celebrity spokesperson idea. The old gal was game and sent a KILLER press kit that showed she still had great gams, and she was our top choice for the job. But the client "changed directions" so we had to drop it. Damn! She would have been great.

Was great. Is great. Gotta vote for her.


Debbie Debbie Debbie


Natalie!!


Ooooooh harsh.
Debbie.


Love Debbie, but damnit...

I'm sticking with Natalie.


Definately Debbie. No question.


Debbie, Carrie's momma. Both women have a mouth that cracks me up every time.


You are not fighting fair. I adore them both.

Debbie.


bitchybitchybitchy

I'm going with Debbie. She survived being dumped by Eddie Fisher, and starred in my favorite all-time musical, "Singing in the Rain" (and no, I will never forgive Stanley Kubrick for using that song for a rape scene in Clockwork Orange-sorry for the digression,folks).


blood in her tap shoes, toe-to-toe with gene kelly? if i may quote, "Ladies, give it up for a trooper, because that bitch held her own."

debbie!


Brunettes need to stick together.

Natalie


BEA ARTHUR!


YES! Very...and thank you!
:)
Debbie gets my vote.
R.I.P. Pepper and Barbarella *sniff*
~Zombiebirdhouse


Tom in Chicago

Look boys, no panty-line because...no panties.

debbie reynolds with her wig on backwards FTW.


I would go for Debbie, but I kinda feel bad for Natalie. Let me make it a fair fight--Natalie FTW!


Well you almost got me but just knowing that Debs has spent six decades performing in Branson, I'm going with Natalie.


Love you, Natalie, but you just came face to face with the Unsinkable Molly Brown, lady! DEBBIE, DEBBIE, DEBBIE...(shaking my pom poms)...


Oh.........pooh!
I was sure that you were going to save Debbie for the finals. I mean, once you put lil' Ms. Unsinkable into the mix, how could we not vote against her! Gah!

(But I m dying to see who you think can overcome her.....)

Debbie Reynolds, FTW


Whoa, no contest. Debbie.


Goddammit! Angie! Oh Fine. Debbie.


Debbie, for sure, and for a long run.

But I bet DuBois has foreshadowed shrewedly... my gosh, what a battle it would/will be between Debs and Doris....!

All the best,

NDC


Natalie's reign is DONE. Debbie all the way.


In *those* pictures? Definitely Natalie.


another laura

I really could not understand the Natalie love around here.

DEBBIE!!!!!!!!


Dear sweet freaking publicist! I can't fathom this amping of Natalie Woods because I just can't see her as any sort of icon, let alone Dame or Diva.

ahem.

Sore loser persona is put aside for now.

Debbie Reynolds. Say what you will, THAT is an icon.


Love to Natalie, but I have to go with Debbie on this one.


Joining Lisa on the picket line.

What gives, gals? Natalie over Angie??!! Are you kidding me.

Hhrrunmpf.


Sorry boys, I don't mean to be a dirty bitch, but I just can't help it.

Natalie again.


Natalie!


While I love Natalie, I'm going to have to go with Debbie, FTW.


You crafty bitches.

Debbie - and you already knew that!!


Gotta be Debbie. Just so spunky!:)


Aarrrggghh!! How could you? Lets go with the SURVIVOR - Debbie!! (But I still love you, Nat.)


Debbie


Debbie. And not for "Singing in the Rain" but for "In and Out".


Oh bitches, it's gotta be Debbie


Honesty.not.pc

Debbie FTW.

God I love her! Singing in the Rain is my very favorite musical. I hope she wins this whole thing.


Clearly it's Debbie! "Am I That Easy to Forget?" No way, Debbie!


Natalie bitches.


Debbie in a runaway!

Her Fabulosity is apparent in every incarnation from Singing in the Rain to Mother! And having caught her live at her casino years ago, I can tell you she is priceless!!

(True story -- at the Debbie Reynolds Casino gift shop there was a lifesize cardboard cut-out of Carrie Fisher as Princess Leia standing at the front with a post-it on her forehead reading "I'm for sale!" Talk about your maternal therapy issue!)


I'm sticking with Natalie.

When Debbie opened her hotel/casino (which didn't remain open long) in my hometown of Las Vegas she was an unbearable local. She's become too hammy in her old age and it turns me off. Oh and her constant cry of "I'm Princess Leia's mother!" which she thinks is so funny, is really just so annoying!

Natalie for the win!


Debbie Debbie Debbie!


I like Natalie, but Debbie all the way.

Singing in the Rain, Tammy and the Bachelor, her polite sarcasm, Will and Grace, Mother, the fact that she is STILL fabulous, her being the inspiration for "Postcards from the Edge", her being an example for Jennifer Aniston by not only surviving the whole Eddie Fisher / Liz Taylor bull**** , but surpassing it, and did I say that she is STILL fabulous?

Please, her and Eartha Kitt are my role models?

Debbie!!!!


Have to stick with Natalie.


Debbie


Ms. Wood


I can't believe you guys would play this card!!! Debbie of course!!


Gotta go with Debs!


Debbie.


Still Natalie for me.


The Debster.


Yes, Debbie.

BrianB


Natalie


Debbie....

But, if you trot out Doris, everyone else is history. I'm serious. Total fangirl.


Goddamnit! Natalie over the incomparable Angie?! WTH?

Now, you could stick Marion Davis against Natalie, and I'd still vote against the latter.

But against Debbie there is seriously no contest.


No contest: it's Debbie FTW.


Not cool guys. Not cool

Debbie


Debbie.

Now a Debbie-Liz Taylor match-up would be divine. . .


Debbie!


Whatever else, you have to give it up for someone who lost her man to Elizabeth Taylor at the absolute height of her beauty, and who still managed to come out smiling and steely-strong. A gazillion years later, she's scraping the protective frost off the sherbet and she's still fabulous. Go, Debbie!


I get that you are in pain, but you bitches fight dirty. Dirty, dirty, dirty.

Ugg. I love you Nat, but I have to go with Debbie. She's a triple threat. You cant really beat that.

I am shaking my head in disgust with you, TLo.


Tom in Chicago said...
Look boys, no panty-line because...no panties.
Haha! Grace's mom FTW!


Natalie!!


It's gotta be Debbie


I didn't vote last week because I love them both--now I wish I'd voted for Angie.

But I'll take Natalie.

I love that girl.

But how 'bout Doris, Liz, Marilyn, Judy, Grace, Sophia--too big, too legendary, too iconic?


Debbie, of couse! As if there was any contest


Sorry girls!
Natalie FTW


Debbie & her bloody tap shoes.


She lost her husband to Liz Taylor. Debbie every damn day of the week.


Why ... of course it is Debbie! Not a doubt in my mind.


I go with Natalie, she can beat Liz Taylor from beyond... haha

Debbie lost her husband to Liz Taylor, so she's no contender to me.


So far, only one player has made it to the next round.

At this rate, we won't get another two until Christmas 2010. If this vote goes the way that I think it will end.


Though I love Singin' in the Rain and she did the pretty okay Irene on Broadway, I've just never been a Debbie fan. She always seems to be pushing so hard and is just too "Ha-cha" Show Biz for my taste.

I love that Debbie's "too much-ness" helped produce the hi$lariously caustic Carrie Fisher and influenced Postcards from the Edge, but I'm sticking with sweet, pretty, natural Natalie.


Okay, I can't believe that Natalie beat out Angie!

DEBBIE for the win. Nat doesn't stand a chance.


that's not playing fair! and i love it! Debbie for the block!


NO FAIRRRRRR!!!!
Ya gotta go with Debbie.


Miss Debbie Reynolds, darlings.

Her make up is. to. die.


I'm going to go with Maria...I mean Natalie.


No. Uh-uh. Not fair. DAMMIT.


I don't care. Natalie.


Considering we just had Carrie Fisher here for Wishful Drinking, AND Debbie herself was here singing with the Seattle Men's Chorus, I've gotta go with that fabulous lady


I feel like I'm supposed to like Debbie, but she's just never done it for me. I don't get the appeal.
I vote Natalie!

p.s. Angie was robbed!


I'm sticking to my guns.

NATALIE again.


Oh, I love Natalie, but have to go with Debbie, no question.


Debbie. Love her to pieces and frankly don't care for Natalie Wood and never have.


If Debbie Reynolds does not win, I will officially resign from homosexuality.

The Unsinkable Debbie Reynolds!


Debbie! She can dance AND sing!


DEBBIE.

"All I do is dream of you the night through..."


So, my last bad boat joke did NOT help Angie win, which, she clearly should have ...

But that won't stop me from making another one.

Cause NOW we are talking about the UNSINKABLE MOLLY BROWN who tap danced and survived the TITANIC, while Natalie couldn't handle her wine or her dinghy.

Just sayin-

P.S. Thank you TLO for bringing out the big guns to take Natalie done.

P.P.S. Yes, it was a dirty thing to do, but it HAD TO BE DONE.


Debbie, Damnit.


Oh hell, that wasn't even fair...Debbie!

*sigh* Poor sweet little Daisly
Clover....


Natalie, of course. Triple duh!


SmartAss said...

P.S. Thank you TLO for bringing out the big guns to take Natalie done.


I didn't know Ricky Ricardo posted here!


Debbie all the way, sweet revenge for Angie!!


I have to vote for Natalie, because I've been told I look like her. Maybe in bar lighting after a few cocktails.


Debbie, Debbie, Debbie!


If you look up "virgin" in the dictionary you will see Debbie's picture...

Gotta go with Debs on this round.


Sorry, not a big Debbie Reynolds fan. I still love Natalie.


It's not just that I'm not that big a fan of Natalie... not just that I voted first for Jane and then for Angie... (I'm not bitter!) it's that Debbie is just DEBBIE. Sure, maybe she's a little campy. But that girl's got guts. She got fleeced by a manager, bankrupted by a wayward husband, betrayed on the front page of every newspaper by no less than Liz Goddamn Taylor, and she put a smile on her face and kept going. God bless her, poodles - Debs FTW!


Debbie.

Haha.


Debbie! I loved Singing in the Rain.


Natalie, Natalie, Natalie, Natalie, Natalie, Natalie, Natalie.


there are 7 of us here. so count that as 7 votes.

Oh, c'mon, Debbie has always been so lame. The only good thing she ever. did was give birth to a little gal who turned out to be a wild tornado with bagels on her ears.

At least Natalie told Santa Claus that he was a crazy man. Great little spitfire from the get-go. And death shrouded in rumour and inuendo gives her added panache.


Debbie, of course!


Debbie. Screw the "against the grain" votes, bitches :-P


Aw c'mon man, what a tough choice! But I must go with Natalie.


If only because on her appearance on Will and Grace she had no pantylines because....wait for it...no panties...my vote goes to Debbie Reynolds!


Uh, HELLO! Debbie of course!


Oh, Debbie all the way.

She may come across a sweet, innocent, young thing, but the dame had balls. She took everything that was thrown at her (and it was some nasty shit, too) and came out of it fairly well.

SisterZip


OMG. How could you do this to us?

Natalie DROWNED for fuck's sake!

~sigh~ Debbie, of course, it has to go to Debbie. She's a goddess.


Gotta go with Tammy from "Tammy and the Bachelor"!


Natalie if you please.


I am so proud that I guessed Debbie Reynolds based on the partial face on the main page.

I loved Tammy growing up, and I love Gypsy as a grown up (Let me entertain you...).

I am going for

DEBBIE

if only among other things, she has to take on La Liz.


This comment has been removed by the author.

Who is left, Marilyn Monroe, Audrey Hepburn, Elizabeth Taylor and Doris Day?


Like there's even a question here.

Debbie.


natalie!

for being carried to the ER by a scuba suit wearing Dennis Hopper after a "reaction" to the champagne hot tub they were frolicking in.

then again, did she sleep with Hopper? Ewww


I think there should be a sudden death match between Jane and Leslie Caron, since they won two matches.


I forgot to add Gina Lolo into the mix as well.


Debbie -

sweet but ruthless


Natalie for the win.


I am still going for Natalie,


Already voted.

No talk of Debbie being one of the most NOTORIOUS undercover lezzies from Hollywood's Golden Age?


Must discuss this with the other bitches in the office before submitting official vote. (Which let me tell you, we so look forward to the Vixen/Virgin debate every week.)

Its going to be interesting. Can you really compare "Tammy and the Bachelor" against "Splendor in the Grass?" How about "Singing in the Rain" against "West Side Story?"

interesting indeed...


Natalie


Good mornin' to you! Debbie, please


You dirty, DIRTY bitches.

Singin' In The Rain is my all-time favorite movie, and I will never forget (and always bust up laughing over) Debbie singing "Gloria" as Mommy Adler on Will & Grace.

However, even though she has a nice singing voice, Jean Hagen actually recorded the dialogue in Singin' that Debbie is supposedly dubbing; so you have Jean Hagen dubbing Debbie Reynolds dubbing Jean Hagen. And when Debbie is supposedly dubbing Jean's singing of "Would You", the voice singing actually belongs to Betty Noyes, who had a much richer singing voice than Debbie. So points deducted for that.

And Natalie has more "iconic" roles than Debbie - Splendor in the Grass, West Side Story, Rebel Without a Cause, Miracle on 34th Street, Gypsy...

This is a VERY difficult decision. My heart is saying Debbie, but my head is saying Natalie. Or maybe it's the other way 'round.

Ah, screw it.

Sorry Debbie. Fabulous as you are, I can't change horses in midstream. Not this time, anyway.

NATALIE WOOD.


Debbie for the win!!


Sticking with Natalie on this one. Debbie is great, but it bothers me that she lost her fortune a zillion times and never had luck with men.


DEBBIE DAMN IT! And if Natalie Wood somehow wins this round too, I am no longer participating in this sham. I cannot BELIEVE stupid Natalie Wood beat Angie, what is wrong with the world.

DEBBIE, DEBBIE, DEBBIE. Have you ever seen her in Mother with Albert Brooks? She is priceless. Protective ice. *snort*


DEBBIE!!!

Her book, Debbie, is a masterwork and should be required reading.


i've been agonizing all weekend, you sneaky little whores. honestly i have. i'm sticking with Natalie though, i've just always loved her as a fellow brunette. and Debbie, I do love ya, but you'll always kind of be Carrie's mom to me..smooches!


NWood!


Daniel, Natalie Wood's vocals in West Side Story were dubbed by Marni Nixon.

Both of those bitches were fakers, so I can't vote based on singing ability.

Debbie is the far superior dancer, but Natalie was Gypsy Rose Lee!

And they are both gorgeous.

Damn you, TLO. This is a dirty trick. You should have rigged this so my girl Angie could have her rightful place.

Natalie for the win. I'll take a vixen over a virgin any day.


Jess-

Oh, I know. And supposedly, Natalie's singing was a-w-f-u-l, whereas Debbie can actually sing, but someone decided her voice either wasn't what they wanted or wasn't good enough. It's just that the story of Debbie's dubbing isn't as widely known as that of Natalie's, so I wanted to put it out there. They're pretty even on the singing front.

Dammit, now I'm questioning my decision again.

NO. I must remain resolute. That way I can have it both ways when Debbie inevitably wins.


Debbie! I can't imagine who would ever surpass her!


C'mon, Splendor in the Grass...

NATALIE!!!!


Natalia.


NATALIE, NATALIE, NATALIE!!!!


Natalie! Waaaay more talented


Not only is Debbie a better singer (and dancer, and actress, and icon, and legend), but she's damn sure a better swimmer.
Just saying.
Debbie for the win!


So wait, first Natalie was a virgin and now she's a vixen? Just because it's a different photograph? WTF?

Debbie for consistency.


I'm going to side with the overwhelming majority for once. Singin' In the Rain is my favorite movie musical and Debbie Reynolds is a major reason why.


Natalie


Whenever I think of Debbie Reynolds, I think of 'Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas'


Debbie. Crazytastic Showdown!


Debbie. Landslide.


Yeah...can't argue with the masses on this one.

Debbie all the way.


Natalie. Natalie. Natalie.


I choose StoveTop Stuffing, although choosy mothers choose Jiff!


Anonymous
5/20/09 3:26 PM I choose StoveTop Stuffing, although choosy mothers choose Jiff!


Que? o_0


Debbie.


A friend of mine, as a child, was in a touring company of Annie in which Debbie Reynolds played Miss Hannigan. I asked what Ms. Reynolds was like. Her response, and I quote: "Drunk. All. The time."

Debbie Reynolds FTW


Natalie!


The beautiful Natalie.





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