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Make Me A Supermodel: Episode 7

Swinging '60s, bitches!

"Who's Andy Warhol?" Oh please. Between Rumspringa Sally here and never-touched-a-boob Colin, we've about had our fill with the "wide-eyed naif" stereotypes.

Say what you will about the show, but these spoiled little brats are getting quite the opportunity just by being on it. Most just-starting-out models don't have portfolios filled with world-class photography, hair, and makeup.

Bitch, please. Just say it: ANY boob is scary to you. We don't like to speculate about people's orientation but we long ago gave up on the illusion that this kid is straight.


Because THAT'S how a young, dumb, and full of cum straight guy responds to the question.

What an amazing shot. We were okay with the pick for the winner, but it astonishes us that this shot got virtually no mention from the judges. Jordan and Jonathan have fantastic chemistry together and they play off each other really well. The only criticism we have - and it's a slight one - is that Jonathan's not giving the best possible face here.

God, what an awful shot. Like Jenny said in the judging, it doesn't even look like they're occupying the same space. They're both giving terrible face and (this isn't 100% her fault) Kerryn's hair, makeup and dress look awful.

Another stunning shot. The "pointing at the camera" pose could look awfully cheesy, but it works for the setting. They're supposed to look like a couple of players, after all. Branden amazes us. In video (and probably in person), he's a cute guy, but when he's photographed, all the planes of his face come together in a way they wouldn't under any other circumstances. That's the mark of a model. Sandhurst is striking under any circumstances.

A pretty decent shot considering:

a: They hate each other
b: Amanda is so bland, and
c: We hate to say it, but Laury simply isn't attractive enough to be a model. It's not just that her face is unremarkable; it's that it looks hard in pictures. She comes off looking at least a decade older than she is.

Fantastic shot. The result of several factors coming together, not the least of which is both girls look great side by side, and because of their short hair and big eyes, it was child's play to make them up to look like the period. We loved the Jonathan/Jordan shot, but this one just had all the right elements in play.

So Salome and Mountaha get the go-see. It's not even worth screencapping because the minute they walked into the place, it was obvious they were the wrong girls for the job. Let's do runway instead!

We HATED this challenge. It was just too damn stupid for words. Sure, models, especially when they're starting out, have to do some pretty low-rent stuff, but judging them on how good they look in trashbags and masking tape is damn silly. And we wanted to scream when they referred to this crap as "couture."

Although we admit, it did separate the wheat from the chaff. Colin and Keryn did a TERRIBLE job.
And once again, these two managed to polish a turd. They didn't look great by any stretch, but they had fun with it and did the best possible walk under the circumstances.

When it was down to these four, we said "Screw the double elimination. Just make it a quadruple."

Whatever promise Colin showed at the beginning has long evaporated and he's not growing or going anywhere. Unless he pulls out some sort of amazing turnaround next week, he should be going home next.

Kerryn's another one who used up any goodwill. She's had some good moments, but as the judges said, she's "fading." Besides, no matter how good she might be, she failed the photoshoot AND the runway in the same week. That spells "sayonara."

And Laury simply doesn't have it. The looks, the presence, or the professionalism.

Text Color

She gets the prize for all-time sorest winner, though. Sure, Salome's win seemed a little arbitrary to us but attacking her on the way out the door? Not cool, honey.

[Photos: Lowit - Screencaps:]

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i was just wondering when we'd get your recap of this episode- and POOF! here it is. :)

I'm with you.
I wish the bottom four had just all gone.

Honestly, I look forward to these almost as much as I look forward to the show. :D

And ... yeah, the bottom four were HORRIBLE this week, as much as it pains me to say that about darling Colin. It's disappointing, really, because I feel like he could be absolutely fabulous but just has NO CLUE.

I like Salome more every week, even with her "ZOMG MENONITE" routine.

Yeah, auf the 4 of them! Let's get on with the real competition! Now it's 2 more weeks - first Colin, then Amanda.

Marty the Wizard

While I agree that Sandhurst and Brandon took a good picture I'm hard pressed to figure out how the styling was either 1960s or "mod." And the decision to cut Kerryn over Colin was BOGUS. The judges/producers clearly wanted to end up w/ 4 guys and 4 girls, b/c there is no rationally explanation for keeping Colin otherwise. I mean I like his look, but he has shown zero development from week to week. Both his photo and catwalk were lousy. When Tyson said, "You've gone from Clark Kent to Superman, but the judges aren't sure you're a Supermodel," I thought: this is nonsensical scripted patter, b/c the truth is Colin is still Clark Kent.

LOVED the photoshoot. SO cool!
Colin needs to go. His time is up.

I'm still in love with Colin, although I recognize he did horribly last night. Thank God Tyson also loves him.

TLo, you're too kind to recap this for the five people who watch this show.

God, Jonathan is so hot. Le Sigh.

"Anonymous said...

TLo, you're too kind to recap this for the five people who watch this show."

Well, if you look at the number of people posting here (see the other recaps too). It's a lot more than just five : )

I'm so sick of them ignoring Jonathan, who clearly does the best each week, takes stunning pictures, walks excellently, and is always professional, in favor of people who are just not as good. Salome annoys the crap out of me even when she's just standing there, Amanda could never model, I thought both of her "wins" were undeserved, Sandhurst and Branden are both good models, not great, but good, and Jordan is just really bratty always, even the way she stands is bratty.

I loved the shot of Mountaha and Salome. It brought back great memories of my modeling days in the swinging '60's. sigh......we did have some great looks, especially the hair styles, which I still sport to this day. Thank God for Sassoon!!!!
BUT, I am so sick of Salome and the Mennonite thing. Do they purposely edit in EVERY mention she makes of Mennonite-this and Mennonite-that?? Enough already!!!
Plus, I think Mountaha's part of that shot was ever so much better than Ms. Mennonite's.
And will someone, anyone, please get Nichole some strong espresso or a few dozen uppers?
She always looks and sounds stoned.
The runway part of the show was ridiculous. I agree that all four at the bottom should have been tossed out on THEIR bottoms.

I thought it was absolutely bizarre that they were all so shocked Salome won. Her face IS the 60's! The second I heard the them I knew they would slap eyelashes on her and she would take it easily. Like, duh. Pick who works for the shoot best, not your bff or who you want to fuck (KERRYN!!!!)

Didn't love the Jonathan/Jordan shot.

I think Colin's "I'm a virgin" naivete is a lot more forced than Salome's Mennonite comments. At least hers apply to what's going on at the time. Colin just likes to interject his faux inexperience at awkward times for no reason.

This "gyrate down the runway like a damn fool" shit REALLY pisses me off. When the hell does that happen in real life? Like, hardly ever. None of these hos are gonna be walking for Heatherette, so give it up. PLEASE. Most of them can't even give a decent normal model walk!

And since when did Colin go from Clark Kent to Superman? He hasn't improved a bit since day 1, he's just gotten like with maybe ONE decent shot. All four in the bottom should have gone home, with the possible exception of Kerryn (who was terrible this week, and kind of a baby).

Sandhurst is a diva. He looked totally pissed when he didn't win. He is 'meh' to me.

Laury was not very good, and did herself no favors at the end. We get it, you're pissed you got kicked off and the girl you hate won. Don't pretend there's anything more to "Salome's dark side" than that. SORE loser.

I like Salome and Jonathan the best. I would like Jordan if she wasn't such a heinous bitch all the time. And I tend to LIKE the heinous bitches! Girlfriend is over the top ridiculous.

Oh PS I thought Salome's comment on the runway that she "3 inches" room for improvement was completely adorable. Besides the whole she's-already-thin-and-they-want-her-to-be-a-beanpole thing anyway.

I agree the shot of Salome & Mountaha was the best of the bunch. But I think Mountaha deserved the win for both photoshoot & runway - the girl is really amazing to watch.

Hormonally I responded to the Sandhurst/Brandon shot. Yum!

And total props for getting this post up so fast! I did a doubletake when cliked over this am to check in.

I fell asleep half way through.
So WOW Jordan's 60s shot wasn't the winner ? I mean I love Salome's also but Jordan was giving killer-face !!!

As for the bitchy attitudes, its getting harder and harder to tell if there's really that many nasty people out there or everyone's just figuring that more tv-camera-face-tame is worth adopting an asshole persona.

that's tv-camera-face-TIME

Yeah, Colin is adorable and has a beautiful face, but he has no idea what to do with his body or the face. The best male is Jonathan, without a doubt. Branden takes good pics, but is very underwhelming in person. Laurey going off on Salome was just bitter grapes; I've known many people who behave differently than their upbringing, myself included.

One of the amazing things about Salome's shot is how she used the angles to make herself look a lot thinner than she is. Combine that with her very 1960s face and the undeniable chemistry with Mountaha, and I can totally see why the photographer chose her.

The shot of Jordan and Jonathan is a great shot but she, in particular, does not scream "60s" the way Salome does in her photo.

For the photoshoot, Colin should have gone for a Buddy Holly-ish thang with Kerryn as his wide-eyed groupie. Sadly, whatever promise Colin had, he's just not been able to take the advice he's been given and turn it into gold. Even if he went super nerdy, it'd be more than he's giving now.

Laury. Gawd, I'm so glad she's gone. She's never impressed me and her classless exit made me dislike her even more.

As for the "who's Andy Warhol" and "I don't even know who Twiggy is" shit? ENOUGH! Regardless of whether you lived in a religious vacuum of a society or are 19 and pretty much clueless about pop culture before 1999, one would think these kids would do their fashion homework or something just so they don't look totally ignorant. Oh, and Salome's surely seen ANTM, don't you think? Remember when Twiggy was a judge? Just sayin'.

I'm just waiting until the finale so I can wash my hands of the majority of them.

Jordan will have to screw up terribly to not win this thing, as will Jonathan. Sandhurst is going to have to step up and work a little harder to beat Jonathan, but he's still a strong contender.

Oh, just give the title to Jonathan already. Colin improved for a few episodes, then stopped. I really thought they'd send him home yesterday.

I understand that Jordan is a very good model, and all the judges declare her ready to go out on real jobs, etc., but I don't see her as a "supermodel". Salome could be it if she toned up and walked better.

"'Who's Andy Warhol?" Oh please."

As a native Pittsburger, that question deserves an open-handed smack in the mouth.

Being a child of the 60's, I loved the photo shoot. Several of the final shots seemed to have just floated off the pages of my parents' magazines.

Can't say much else as these modeling shows are incomprehensible to me. I'm never sure if I think the judging and judges' feedback are arbitrary and contradictory because I don't know enough about modeling or because they are arbitrary and contradictory. And I am either horrendously annoyed by or feel deeply sorry for the contestants. Sometimes both at the same time.

The commentary here, however, reaches a much higher standard!

I have to wonder whether the producers are purposefully keeping Salome ignorant. I'm not clear on how much time there is between challenges (as opposed to last season, when they were almost in real time), but why hasn't she been reading, at the very least, fashion magazines so that she'd know who more of the designers are. Or maybe a few history of fashion lectures. And why, oh why, hasn't someone taken her aside and said, "Honey, Sal-OH-me is a lunch meat. SAL-oh-may was a fabulous bitch who was hot enough to get a man's head delivered to her on a platter. If you'd rather be the former, then you're really in the wrong business." She's very young and very inexperienced, but I really don't think she's too stupid to be taught.

Also, I didn't get that runway challenge. Clearly, the best thing to do with Jonathan would have been to tell him to lose the shirt and just send him down the runway in his briefs. Maybe with a hat or a turban or something. It's downright criminal to obscure that torso.

Umm...what about the full-body bear hug that Colin gave Brandon after the elimination? The camera just barely caught him running and leaping into Brandon's arms and wrapping his freaking legs around Brandon's waist!?!?! Brandon looked a skooch uncomfortable but I think it sheds yet more light on why li'l Colin ain't never kissed a girl.

sandhurst to take it all is my prediction.

I do not think cycle 2 is as good as cycle 1. I do not care about any of these people and they all seem to be missing a personality.

The contestants of cycle 2 just aren't good reality TV. The contestants of cycle 1 were great realty TV,

I still watch each episode due to my love and "groupiness" for the fashion and modeling industry.


FYI you can pronounce Salome's name either way. Gloria Swanson's Norma Desmond said it like our faux-menonnite and that woman was a pretty fierce bitch.

I can see where her apparent naivete can get rather incredulous and hard to accept. I read even Tyson and Nicole wonder about themselves

Actually I thought Salome kind of lucked out with the runway. She really needs to work on her walk. She might have booked the go-see otherwise


I was actually really surprised by Kerryn's elimination, since she's done so well in the past. Laury's elimination was expected, and Colin and Amanda are probably up next as well.

I've loved Salome from day one - I wish someone would hire her at the go-see for once. Same with Mountaha. Of the remaining girls, they're my faves.

Johnathan, Branden, and Sandhurst delivered as we expected. Jordan, though, just grinds me the wrong way. Her constant "I hate Amanda" routine is so high-school it gives me a headache. Professional and strong as she might be, her attitude is just all wrong.

Loved the photo-shoot, iffy on the catwalk (though the Salome/Mountaha and Johnathan/Jordan match-ups showed some pretty cool "designs").

P.S. Laury, being a sore loser is so unbecoming of you. Frankly, I think you're reading way too much into how Salome acts. Certainly not going to get you too far like that.

I think Colin should have gone home. His photo looked like Jim Kerrey - terrible!

I kind of think Salome won this week the same way Sandhurst won the last challenge. She has a lot of potential and she's been improving, so it was time to give her a win.

I love Mountaha, but she has some facial features that limit her work as a photographic model.

Jordan has that kind of bland prettiness that translates well into a lot of different looks--the personality though--ugh.

Still, I think it's between her and Salome (if she continues to treadmill and starve) on the girl's side and Jonathan and Sandhurst on the men's side--though Branden probably has the best bone structure for photography.Well, Colin, actually, but he's so physically shut down that he can't pose except by accident.

Laury and Kerryn were both among the older models--and I think the judges expect a little more accordingly and judge bad weeks more harshly. Kerryn needed to stay more on top.

Laury just doesn't have the face--jawline's a little too square and thrusting to photograph well. Bad boob job detract from a really great body. But she's just second-tier--runway not photographic.

Which may have something to do about her bitter outburst at Salome--Salome was born with a face a camera loves and despite Laurie's hard work she'll never have that piece of luck.

I just can't think Salome is that vile--she said that awful thing to CJ at the first go-see, but she doesn't badmouth anyone in interviews. She mostly seems a bit self-absorbed and a little full of herself like a lot of 19- year-olds.

yet another laura

Speaking of supermodel-shows:
Robert Best is on tonights episode of Germany's next Topmodel, they are casting for a Barby-Shoot for Vogue and he was introduces as "a really great designer"
No reunion with Heidi though, she's not in that part of the episode.

I don't have much to add to what everyone else has said.

Kerryn - do they not take into consideration past successes? She's received immunity twice! Colin has NEVER even been in the top-rated group. He should have gone home.

Laury - definitely looks older than her age, definitely needed to go.

Sandhurst's photo was OK. I don't know why the judges were drooling over it. As other said, it also had nothing to do with the 60's.

I really thought Amanda had more potential, but she really is breaking apart. Girl needs to pull herself together. She's constantly leaning on everyone else's shoulders.

But overall, cool photo shoot, bad runway challenge (although it had potential).

Oh, also, whenever I see Mountaha I immediately think of "Desperately Seeking Susan." Don't know why, there's just something so 80's about her.

You guys are kidding, right? Why should Salome spend all her time reading fashion magazines, studying fashion history, watch ANTM 24/7, blah blah blah when most everybody else is equally as clueless? And what does the fashion industry really have to do with not knowing who Andy Warhol is beyond the most tenuous pop culture connections? ("Ooh, Andy Warhol made a dress once and photographed clothes a couple times" doesn't count.) I don't necessarily believe it's all for real but beyond some slight annoyance I don't know why it really matters.

I mean, I'm not so clueless as to think this show has anything to do with real modeling. A lot of the runway challenges are downright ridiculous, and the models in general are pretty damn clueless. Salmone no more than anyone else, really. (She said she didn't "really know" who Twiggy is, but obviously knew she was a model in the 60's. Um, what more is there to really know? Do you guys know her entire life story? Would it have anything to do with your ability to walk down a runway in some clothes? Nope.)

Yeah, I think we're all a little tired of the "I don't know what olives or swimming pools are" routine but Salome doesn't come across as a terrible person; there was no reason for Laury to be that nasty to her.

I liked the idea of the runway challenge. The results were mostly awful but I think I would watch a reality show about that kind of design competition. It was performance more than fashion, obviously, but I thought it was fun.

Oh, and I think the judges picked the right bottom four but I don't think Kerryn should have been in the bottom two.

JJ said...
While I agree that Sandhurst and Brandon took a good picture I'm hard pressed to figure out how the styling was either 1960s or "mod."

No, it wasn't mod, but it definitely encompasses that Rat Pack-Swinger-Playboy After Dark Hefner atmosphere which was VERY (early) 1960s.

"Rumspringa Sally" ... OMG, that is the most perfect nickname EVAH. I loves me a good Pennsylvania Dutch reference!


I am totally with you on the "Colin is a closet case" thing. I picked that up episode one.

Thing is, I totally relate to his late-sexual-bloomer body-awkwardness for exactly the reason that I was very much the same way. Though I must say back in my teen days there was much more reason to stay closeted longer.

Anyway, this is just to say that give me a night alone with him and he'll come out of it a very new man. :)


Love, love the photo of Jonathan and Jordan-they do have such great chemistry.

TLo, you are so right about Branden when he's photographed-it's such a transformation. Sandhurst is adorable, as always,

Moutaha and Salome-great

P.S. -love your Rumpspringa Saly comment!

I can't believe the judges didn't mention how haggard and old Laury and Amanda looked in their picture. They had bags under their eyes, HUGE BAGS. I thought models were supposed to look fresh.

I'm so glad to see Laury go! She has no talent and looks way to old to be beginning a modeling career.

Although I love watching Colin, I think he needed to leave before Kerryn. He has improved, but he has gone as far as he will ever go. Kerryn, even though she completely screwed up this week, at least has talent and some potential.

Honestly, you're WAY off regarding Colin.

No one can judge a runway properly when the rules make no sense.

Colin has tremendous potential and with the exception of the candy shot, has done OK to pretty good. Actually Colin was better on the runway this week than Kerryn, which is inconceivable unless Kerryn was ill. (And she looked like something was wrong.) And if you look at Colin's picture separately from Kerryn, it's not bad.

AMANDA on the other hand, hasn't shown much and is very bland.

Granted, I thought Colin should go before Kerryn, but Amanda has less potential & gift than Colin.



Because THAT'S how a young, dumb, and full of cum straight guy responds to the question.

LMAO!! I love Branden's youthful enthusiasm, it's so endearing.

Salome's gorgeous and one of my favorites, and I can forgive her not knowing who Andy Warhol is, maybe even Madonna (who I believe she did recognize), but didn't she also say who is Laurent? As in Yves Saint Laurent? That's a little ridiculous right there.

TLo's comment about the planes in Branden's face all coming together in a shot?

Right on. In fact, it's reminiscent of Paul Newman in The Long, Hot Summer.

So I just have one question: when are we going to see Johnathan's underwear photo shoot that he booked a couple of weeks ago?

someone tell jordan & her black parka to stfu

brandan or jonathan ftws.. although jon keeps aging to me.. probably because he mentions his wife & baby so much.

also, whenever I see Colin, I think Lenscrafters. mmmm hmm! go-see for Colin at Lenscrafters

My husband was a 21-year old virgin back in the day. A 6'4", athletic, handsome virgin. Why? Because he was a huge nerd and felt really awkward around girls even though he liked some of them quite a bit. Now, I have no idea whether Colin is a closet case or not. Maybe he is. I'm just sayin'.

I thought the photo shoot was so much fun. I loved the pictures, especially the one of Jonathan and Jordan. I bet they'll be the final two.

Every time I see Branden the word "douche" goes screaming through my head. The finger point really drives it home for me. What an ass.

Salome and Mountaha:Edie Sedgewick and Liza Minelli.

TLo, thank you for watching this show so that I don't have to!

"oph said...

Every time I see Branden the word "douche" goes screaming through my head. The finger point really drives it home for me. What an ass."

Oh, really? I think he's just young and immature. I think he's sweet : - )

I'm not going to call Jordan a bitch because I think one has to show a certain amount of creativity and nuance in one's attacks to qualify for the bitch title. Jordan is just plain nasty to Amanda and as far as I can tell, it's not warranted.

I used to be on "Team Jordan", but she's turned me off, so as soon as you guys have more of the "Team Jonathan" t-shirts in stock in my size, send me one and charge it to my account. Jonathan's personality is pretty likable and is a nice compliment to his competence in front of the camera and on the runway.

I admit it. I actually really liked the runway challenge, just because it was so extreme--if you can sell this, you can sell anything. Liked it better than the freak one.

It kind of makes me think of my kid getting in my closet and assembling bizarre outfits.

And I'd love to see a challenge between Cris March and Puppet Girl.

Looking at the photos again, it's clearer to me why Salome won. She's actually managing a very angled pose while looking relaxed. She has the most dynamic body (aside from the Colin/Kerryn) disaster, but still looks good with Mountaha. It's both very posed and relaxed at the same time. I don't think she had the best face shot--probably Jordan or Brandon.

I think Amanda should have gone home before Kerryn. Kerryn has done some amazing shoots, Amanda has just been average.

At least Rumspringa Chickie didn't think Twiggy was dead, like creepy Vincent did on PR (promptly evoking a smackdown from the fabulous Diane Von Furstenberg in the process).

Oh, Colin. Didn't you learn anything from Bill Clinton? You ain't a virgin if you've been sucking the cock. His photo was horrible; there was nothing '60s about it unless you combine the IQs of the two people posing for it.

I've grown weary of Brandon's gay panic. Just take it up the ass, already. You'll find out you're still a man afterwords, and you'll discover the joys of the prostate as well.

Amanda needs a boot to the head. And Laurey looks like she already took one.

This is so coming down to a J&J final two; while Jordan is pretty damned hot, Jonathan is so in command of his body, every space he occupies, and every photo that's taken of him that he's already a supermodel. I just hope the judges don't punish him for the fact they didn't "make him" one.

Damn! I so badly wanted a screen-shot of after Colin says "Your right, theres not chemistry"
the "are you kidding me?" was perfect. I did feel really bad for Kerryn though.

Re: Branden, I think it was "boobies," to be precise. That was the best moment in the episode, I'd say, for its reality factor.

Kerryn was ROBBED! They should have sent Colin-Never-Had-Sex home!!!!

If Salome was truly raised a Mennonite (and, I assume, in a very conservative Christian household), why did her parents name her after a treacherous female? It's kind of like naming your child Jezebel, or Lucifer. Can someone please explain?

Anon 12:09: I think Amanda was saved for her ability to bring drama to reality TV. They always say this isn't the case, but we all know better (see: overly long retention of Blayne, Suede, Vincent, Wendy Pepper, etc.).

To be honest I think the only bad picture was Colin and Keryn's and that they should have gone home. Two bad people in a pic = both should go home. And as far as Salome and Mountha's pic I think Mountha looked great and much better than Salome she didn't look hard or edgy she was pretty!

Mountaha FTW

Colin didn't go from Clark Kent to Superman, he went from Jimmy Olsen to Clark Kent.

Which is an achievement, all things considered.

I'd still marry his narrow, stinky ass.

While I enjoyed Season One of MMAS, the "America Votes" idea was a loser and made the show difficult to watch sometimes.

This year with the judges making the cuts is much more valid.

Even more than with fashion which, like it or not, is about 70% a matter of taste and everyone can play, deciding who is and isn't a model isn't a job for the general public.

Which makes the observations - both from you guys and from your commenters - so dead on. They could indeed have sent home that entire final four because it's obvious that they're Dead Men Walking and has been for some time.

Now that they're down to seven (and you guys could get these things up on the site a tad quicker - we're dying here) (just teasing) , and knowing how the judges think by now, there's just no question at all that Amanda goes home next (she's living on borrowed time)

Salome will do well in the "Naked Shoot" this week. The whole zaftig bit will - just this once - work to her advantage but that will be her last hurrah.

She and Jordan - don't know the order - are just out of lukc, but last season they wouldn't have lasted this long anyway.

In the end though this year will end up with a carbon copy Final Four: three biys and one girl.

Jonathan, Brandon, Sandhurst and Mountaha are the last group, with Brandon as the only one who can't win.

Write it down.

amazing.jonathon&jordan tu,&i agree with yu about jonathon's face,but he is
idk,i wasnt so blown away by brandons looked very much lyk he was at a realistic,i guess.salome looked drunk,but adorable.collin is cute but nt very good.ok, it laury&keryn..ugh keryan awful awful AWFUL

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