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Make Me A Supermodel: Episode 6

Check us out! Getting this post done before a week has gone by and we've all forgotten what the episode is about!


But in case you forgot: This week on MMAS: Hot, Wet (mostly) American Models!

It's always a shock on these bitchy fashion reality shows when someone comes along who's not only quietly professional, but also kind of sweet and patient. Someone obviously dropped the ball by inviting Howard on.

Gratuitous.
Y'know, normally we'd be all "Sack up, ho," but she was genuinely scared and we felt bad for her.

And to her enormous credit (with a lot of help and hand-holding) she managed a pretty memorable shot.

As for the other shots...
Mountaha
Enh. She doesn't look very graceful.

Kerryn
Pretty good, although it's hard to see her face.

Colin
Also pretty good.
Branden
Terrible. Bad face and he was moving around too much.

Amanda
Bad face but great pose.

Sandhurst
Great pose but why is he so far away from the camera?

Laury
Can't see her face and her pose is kinda bland.

Jonathan
It seemed like everyone was swooning over this one and we can't really see why.

Gabriel
Bad face, good pose.
Jordan
Honestly, this wasn't the best out of the pictures. We would have given it to Salome, but what Jordan managed to accomplish was to keep her face and her body in position for the best shot. There's a clarity to the picture that's lacking in most of the others.

So Jordan wins the go-see and takes the only girl she doesn't seem to hate along with her.

It's not surprising that she booked a gig out of it. In a lot of ways, Jordan is the female Jonathan. She's professional and knows what people are looking for. It helps that she's tiny.

No doubt, many of the women in the audience would kill to have a body as "flawed" as Salome's, but the thing is, she really doesn't look all that great in pictures when she's got so much exposed. It's not that she's fat. Of course she's not fat. It's that she's very soft-looking. Yeah, she could probably stand to lose 5 pounds for her career but what she really needs is to tone herself up a bit.

Call us cranky old men if you want, but watching a bunch of college students playing drinking games is so not what we consider fabulous.

Especially when it leads to the inevitable "Shmoopie, I'm sorry." "No, BooBoo, I'M sorry." exchange. Bleh.
It's about time they brought someone in to actually train these models. He managed to help out the girls that needed it, but for some reason, most of the guys walked WORSE after his advice.














Especially Jonathan. Look how stiff he looks. Some models can do it on instinct and when they get instructions, it throws them off. Kerryn and Mountaha continue to show great walks and we were glad to see Mountaha get a little recognition for that this week, especially since we think she had the worst outfit to wear.

It was also nice to see Sandhurst get a little love this week. Granted, it was one of those arbitrary, "He hasn't won yet? Let's give it to him" wins, but still.

We were afraid they were going to cut Branden loose because, let's face it, the criticism that he was getting too cocky and too cheesy was dead on. The judges took into consideration his potential (because he's shown a lot) and made the right choice in the end.

See that facial expression? That's "fear." Unfortunately for Gabriel, it's also "anger," "lust," "joy," and whatever other emotions he feels. He DOES feel emotions, right? It's kinda hard to tell.

"SHMOOPIE'S GONE FOREVER!!!!!"

Oh calm down. You can hook up with him at the reunion party.

[Photos: Howard Schatz/Bravotv.com - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]

Post a Comment
35 comments:

You must be taking Easter weekend off... why else would you put up this review on time?

Poor Gabriel. He was really sad when he was sent home. Oh, wait, I mean he was really happy. No, I guess he was furious. Ummm, who knows how he felt. Do they have model gigs for (how did the photographer say it?) "enigmatic faces?"

Thanks for the Easter gift boys!


That Garbriel shot is so STAYING ALIVE!

All was missing was the feather headband and Sly's loincloth.

I don't even watch this show, but follow your commentary and that's all I need.

Have a Good Easter, ladies. Don't eat too many chocolate eggs!


While I may have agreed with her, Jordan does herself no favors with her immature "Mrrrmrrah, I apologize....mrrmrrmrrrreh, I'm still in high school" snits. I love a good bitch as much as the next person, and have really tried to like Jordan, but something about her seems nasty and just rubs me the wrong way. I am finally seeing why she hates Amanda so much though...she's SO annoying! And this episode made it seem like she was more there for Gabe than for modeling at this point! I will be interested to see if she basically seems to stop caring now that he's gone.

Oh, and Branden's an ass. I can see why he has model-y features, but I don't think he is 'attractive' in the least...especially with the arrogance. Meh.

Salome or Mountaha should have won. Has Mountaha won yet? I feel like she is more deserving of a "You haven't won yet, so I guess we pick you" win than Sandhurst.

Glad Gabe went home though, that was long overdue. With any luck Colin will be next. He's gotten a little better, but not much.


Jordan reminds me of Shannon from season one - technically adept but cold - bordering on mechanical - and about as big around as a pencil. Her height and naturally-slender frame will take her far in the competition, but I don't think she has the fire to win it.

I loved when she referred to her "signature walk", though. Very ANTM!


I actually loved Salome's photo. Jordan's, while technically perfect, looked as though it could have been taken OUT of the pool, and that didn't do anything for me. As for Jonathan's photo, he had genuine movement and went a little wild with it -- that's why it got attention. Sandhurst's seemingly distant shot appears to be that way because of the great reflection and ripples at the top. They couldn't have shown that so well if they'd cropped it too much more.

And that photographer? I officially love him. THAT'S exactly the kind of photographer everyone should be so lucky to work with. Howard was so cool I bet he pees ice cubes. I can only hope my clients like working with me that much.

So glad when the drinking game was done. Even happier when Mr. Blank Face was sent home. Thank God for large favors. (Plus his little "hopeful" mustache was getting on my last nerve.)


Branden is killing me with his old man shuffle walk.

And, where the hell is Malandrino?

No poke at the jackass this week? Did he sweeten your pot with something?


Gabriel looks like he just accidentally pooped in one of his many pairs of underwear in that last pic. His expression could be "fear", "anger", or "WOOPS!".

Happy Easter!

XOXOXOXOXOXO


Yes Jordan rubs me the wrong way as well. Not backstabbing or outrightly mean, but very high school and kind of arrogant. So what if Amanda is annoying? Yes Amanda needs to work on her self-esteem and grow a backbone, but Jordan is equally annoying obssessing over her. Hell even Tyson and Nicole wish she would focus on the assignments and not on Amanda

I am glad they gave Brenden a smackdown. He needed it. He could be a good model but he needed a reality check. But then again the majority of them need that as well.

I loved Jenny's advice to Lauray about the soft bunnies

The bizarre thing is why did they wait so long to bring the runway coach on. And do these people have a trainer like they did in S1?

Frank


Gratuitous.


And we thank you for it. Jonathan is soooo hot. I'm glad they finally sent Gabriel home. The guys was bottom everything every freaking episode. Sandhurst finally proved that he can do more than ballet movements.


Laury has to be the next to go home. She just looks frightened/surprised in every catwalk and meh in every photo.

The judges should send her home before Colin who is still improving, or certainly Brandon, who looks like a model but just needs to learn how to come across as less cocky. He doesn't come across as cocky in the interviews, and I have to think that if Bravo could have edited him to look that way this week, they would have.


Not to be too bitchy, but Jordan won't likely go as far in the modeling world as, let's say, Amanda, b/c of her wide hips. Remember how wonky she looked in those jeans at the go-see?

I loved the "melon under the arm" comment from the runway coach re: Jonathan's practice catwalk. So right on!!

Watching Branden's "i'm too sexy for my shirt" stance morph into "poor, poor pitiful me" during the judging was tres entertaining!


I hate to say it, but the second they started that water shoot, I thought, "Uh oh...another copy of a (gasp) ANTM shoot".
The producers and writers must be driving themselves nuts going through old ANTM episodes. Who knows...maybe next we will see a bullfighting shoot. How about some elephant rides?
Blech...I'm tired of this edition of MMAS already. In fact, I was tired of it after the first episode.
I've said it before and I'll say it again. Just go ahead and declare Jonathan the winner and put us out of our misery!!!
Now that I have had my rant, I would like to wish everyone a Happy Easter and a Blessed Passover.


Yes Jordan is skinny, but she has weird hips. She looks like this:
http://www.rollingstone.com/rockdaily/index.php/2009/04/08/sir-mix-a-lot-likes-burger-kings-ad-money-squarer-booty/


To StkrShock - they actually did an underwater shoot last season as well...right? I'm almost positive...it was in a big tank and everything...unless I am totally mixing up shows.


Yes, I think they did have a water shoot last season too! I'd totally forgotten about that. Wasn't it with a snake or something?


nikki bikki bo bikki said...
To StkrShock - they actually did an underwater shoot last season as well...right? I'm almost positive...it was in a big tank and everything...unless I am totally mixing up shows.

-----------
Yep, I had forgotten about that one...but, here we go again with the ANTM copies. ANTM had a snake shoot, too, but not under water. I guess MMAS decided to combine the two...LOL!


Colin's photo was hot!!!!!

I thought he & Salome & Jordan had the best photos.

And Jordan can go home next. Talk about Jr. High Mean Girl. Geez....

So Amanda's obsessing about her live & child. What.does.that.have.to.do.with.Jordan? If she doesn't want to hear it, then leave the room!


potty mouth princess

Aw c'mon, Gabe's channeling BLUE STEEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111

Only dumber.

WTH happened to Laury? She aged 10 years in about ten days of taping time. She and Amanda are free to go anytime.


Anonymous said...

Yes, I think they did have a water shoot last season too! I'd totally forgotten about that. Wasn't it with a snake or something?



Yes, with a snake, but the results were kind of the same. It's hard to focus underwater.


Good riddance! Gabriel is hot but there is nothing there, man, NOTHING!


Don't know why I'm watching these damn thing, but I actually think Salome has the most potential of the women. She has a terrific face--great skin--and she emotes--easy with the eyes. I think you guys are dead on in that it's a matter of toning more than simply weight loss. She's just soft.

I see her and Colin in sort of the same category--raw, but great potential. Give them a clue and some help.

Glad to see Sandhurst get a win--such a decent person compared to everyone else--as well as beautiful.

Laury needs to go. She's just not top caliber much as she wants it. Hope they don't kick off Salome for the pudge before they kick off Laury.


I'm soooooo glad Sandhurst finally got a win.

I think he has a great body and attitude,and has great potential.

He listens and learns and has natural grace and aptitude...

hope he makes the final,but I have a feeling it will be Jonathan v Jordan...


dayaaaaaam colin

why does he have a slight napoleon dynamite resemblance, though. something in the mouth/jaw.

love SOFT BUNNIES !

Project Rungay ♥


"Call us cranky old men if you want, but watching a bunch of college students playing drinking games is so not what we consider fabulous"
made me laugh SO hard...
-indigo


Yeah, but had they been naked drinking games the boys interest would have piqued! :)


I know that being nice and likeable isn't the point of a bitchy fashion show... but I was happy to see Sandhurst win after being so sweet to Salome & trying to help her overcome her fear of the water. It was just a very human thing to do, when competitions like this usually make people anything but.

Also props to Salome for knowing instantly the real reason that Jordan took her along on the go-see. She may have led a sheltered life, but she sure isn't naive!


Seriously, I had no pity for Salome, just because it was so obvious that while she was scared, a good shot would have come out of it. It's the cliched "oh im scared but i pull off a shot!" thing that Ive seen in both MMAS and ANTM. What a snorrrre. Can you tell I'm not a big fan of hers? Stop. I don't care that you were sheltered as a menonite. Welcome to the big leagues.

As for raw talent, Colin FTW. He's absolutely adorable and without training, he's still good.

I want Laury and Kerryn to be sent home. Neither are good to me, both are sort of freaky (not in the model way) and just are a waste of airtime that could be spent on Johnathan!


Sorry to hijack this post, but I'm so angered by this that I'm posting it all over every blog or website I visit. Please spread the word if you care!

Amazon is apparently stripping sales ranking indicators from LGBT, sexuality and feminist books — because they are “adult material.” The books are blocked from appearing in some searches, and are prevented from appearing on some best-seller lists.

Here’s a list of books that have been de-ranked. Apparently Heather Has Two Mommies and various lesbian parenting guides are “adult.” Interestingly, books like From the Pit to the Palace: Conquering the Spirit of Homosexuality and A Parent’s Guide to Preventing Homosexuality are still considered appropriate to be ranked. Jezebel has more on which books were stripped of their rankings, and which ones weren’t.

Check out #amazonfail on Twitter for more." --from: http://www.feministe.us/blog/archives/2009/04/12/amazon-fail/

From http://community.livejournal.com/meta_writer/11369.html
If you write books with homosexual characters, read books with homosexual characters, please look at this: http://markprobst.livejournal.com/15293.html

Mark, Erastes, and Alex (among others) had their Amazon sales rankings removed over the last few days for The Filly, Transgressions and False Colours respectively. On enquiring about this, Mark was told the following:

" In consideration of our entire customer base, we exclude "adult" material from appearing in some searches and best seller lists. Since these lists are generated using sales ranks, adult materials must also be excluded from that feature.

Hence, if you have further questions, kindly write back to us.

Best regards,

Ashlyn D
Member Services
Amazon.com Advantage"

a growing list of books & discussion is at:
http://www.feministe.us/blog/archives/2009/04/12/amazon-fail/


Hmmm, I think Colin is gorgeous, but I don't think he's a natural in that he's not a very physical or expressive person. Though he's more expressive than Gabe--but, then, who isn't?

Salome's got a long way to go, but she has a potential someone like Jordan doesn't have. Jordan's farther along, but with less overall potential.

I'm not going to compare the women directly to the men because in some ways it's a very different game as far as careers go. Salome's got a face for cosmetics--skin, eyes, mouth--and there isn't anything comparable in terms of money or exposure for men.


Usually on ANTM if someone acts all afraid of water or heights I just was to shake my head and say "umm, you're the one who wanted to be a model, suck it up." But I didn't find Salome annoying at all. I think she actually handled it pretty well by practicing and then getting her shot.

Also, Colin may not be the most "modely" of the boys but he is so cute. I guess I just have a thing for the nerdy look :-P.


1.Salami- actually looks good (makeup, body, dress), but she does look afraid which she is which is I don’t understand why they let something like this slide?
2.Mountha - isn’t actually that bad but it’s not that good either.
3.Colin- meh
4.Brandon- is giving us a lot of Zoolander in this picture ahahahah
5.Amanda- ….next I’m over her lets move on
6.Sandhurst- best picture of the bunch this week ( he was robbed) the judges knew it and had to give him immunity
7.Laury- it’s okay nothing great…but she has an awesome body
8.Jonathan- he did something completely out of the box compared to the other models which usually gets you bad reviews but he’s so damned sexy who can resist?
9.Gabe- PEACE OUT! and your showmance Amanda I hope she gets da boot on this weeks double elimination show
10.Jordan- not sure why you and not Sandhurst won the best pic you also look afraid and not in a model way


I'm happy for Sandhurst, but I don't know, he needs to improve his performance in the photo shoots, otherwise, it's just a pretty man in a photo.


Laury's picture reminded me of Gloria Swanson in SUNSET BOULEVARD


I still think Gabriel is the most beautiful man on TV.
Those eyes, those lips - sigh....


Love love love Colin. And Jonathan is divine. Gabe was cute, but his blue steel look was killing me. Sorry cute boy. Are there women on this show? Hadn't noticed. Too busy looking at the boys.





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