"You better count your blessings, girls. I don't know, you've had this amazing guardian angel that wants you to do so well and I don't know why for the life of me. I have like no faith left."

ROFL. I can't believe they made them stand on the street with their bags open like they're selling fake Louis Vuitton products or something.

"You better count your blessings, girls. I don't know, you've had this amazing guardian angel that wants you to do so well and I don't know why for the life of me. I have like no faith left."

HA!

Ashlie, this is reality TV.
Reality TV, this is Ashlie.

"Cobblestones. No problem, I could run the bulls in these shoes."

Yeah, those geriatric bulls that compete in their age group in Spain....

Wow. Like I said before: This show has Tyra's crazy written all over it. Anybody wanna make a wager concerning TLo being able to make it through the rest of the season?

Anybody forsee a Boobs vs. Megan final fashion deathmatch?

Stylista isn't about finding a great fashion magazine editor any more than America's Next Top Model is about finding, well, America's next top model. If you go into a viewing of either of these light entertainments expecting to gain insight into the industry around which the shows are based you are guaranteed to come away disappointed.

The shows are broadcast on CW and are produced by Tyra Banks et. al. A light weight producer selling a show to what may be America's most frivolous network isn't exactly a combination likely to yield quality television. If you lower your expectations significantly, you may be able to enjoy Stylista for the low brow entertainment that it is without all that unnecessary worry that we aren't actually learning how a major fashion publication actually runs itself day in and day out. There is a place for credible reality television and CW isn't it. That place is called Bravo.

C'est moi, c'est moi Lola said...

Anybody forsee a Boobs vs. Megan final fashion deathmatch?

I think it's between Megan and Ashlie.

"credible reality television" seems to me something of an oxymoron. I love my Bravo shows (PR and Top Design) but even they stretch the limits of credible pretty damn far.

i have no idea why anyone thought that clothes and "assessories" (as EVERYONE pronounces it on this show) heaped in a bag would be a good idea for anything. it was beyond ridiculous.

at least they got rid of two of these lame-ass "contestants" this week. hopefully, they'll keep hacking them down like that and the show will be over before we know it!

"Furthermore, it casts Anne and Elle in a decidedly frivolous, low brow light."

Bwahahahah!
Maybe not what Elle wanted - but what ELSE happens on most reality t.v.?

(I imagine Nina Garcia smiling in satisfaction.)

Oh one last thing, in reference to TLo's Stylista post last week....

Note to Stylista Kate:

Hootie McBoob is from The Simpsons. It's an alias Homer gives to Marge, along with (my favorite) "Chesty LaRue".

So, don't blame me, blame Matt Groening.

No way Kate makes it to the top two. I think she maxes out at three. Maybe Megan vs. Johanna, Johanna vs. Ashlie, some combo like that. I don't think they will have idiot/bitch Kate who's last post here was shocked at "Mc" being part of her nick name (McBoobs, Tits McGee) or evil Megan actually win the thing. I don't think the over the top stereotypes ever win.

Kate- Okay, so you're not highly intellectual, we've all got that. Love the stylista/tresemme interview btw. Self centered brat. But at the very least you must have seen Grey's Anatomy and caught on the whole "Mc" thing.

I'm counting my blessings right now, as I've never watched this "show". That doesn't stop me from enjoying your snark, boys, so keep it coming.

With this show Elle successfully appeals to the lowest common denominator. I expect a feature on how to stylishly drop your boyfriend at prison any day now.

Stylista Kate-
Light colored/acid wash or whatever those are jeans in winter?? Oh my. Or ever? May be in worse taste than the boobie dresses!!

Straight out of the trailer park!

"Tlo said: Girl, please. This is a reality show produced by Tyra frigging Banks, for God's sake. There's no need to be having a crisis of faith over it. Pull yourself together."




Seriouly. That just cracked me up. For thousands of years, humans have endured war, famine, genocide, and bad plastic surgery without losing faith. All it took for the fragile Miss Ashlie was one disagreeable elimination on a reality show.

Poor dear. She does so rely on the kindness of strangers.

--GothamTomato

"Tlo said: Well! I think we've all learned something valuable here. Mainly, that this whole exercise was POINTLESS."



And I've learned that Henri Bendel's offers doggie bags.

Who knew?

--GothamTomato

Dear God,
Please let the legal mess with Bravo vs. Lifetime gets settled soon.

Forgive me; I missed the last episode. I don't understand the challenge and what/how they were supposed to be judged. As in "Who got the most bang for their buck?" or "Who bought the most stylish emsemble?"?

if it wasnt for you TLO......

Bernd said...

I'm counting my blessings right now, as I've never watched this "show". That doesn't stop me from enjoying your snark, boys, so keep it coming.

DITTO! I watched the first episode or two, but have quit. More time efficient--and WAY more interesting--to just get the TLo snark!

I sense you boys are enjoying this show even less than I am. Think I'll stick to the Top Chef reruns from here on out.

One episode was enough for me. It's as if The Apprentice got even stupider.

Absolutely this does no favors for Elle.

Formelyanon: I KNOW. I'm so happy for Nina.

"Tlo said: Well! I think we've all learned something valuable here. Mainly, that this whole exercise was POINTLESS."
Aint it the truth! I was disappointed that after it being such a big deal we didn't even get to SEE the outfits. I expected to have fun picking them apart, but NOOO! "Peek into this bag and see which of these blobs of fabric are going to be a fabulous outfit for your weekend. And if you are lucky, something might fit . . . or not. But you surely want to be dressed for your event by a hapless street-person on a budget." How funny! Are they selling fairy-tales too?

Mama T - considering the lack of intensity with which I was watching...
I believe that the challenge was that they - as an assistance had to run out and get an ensemble for Anne as she was running out to - I think - the Hamptons.
For a grand.

TLO I love your take on the stuff being displayed within the bags - how lazy and cheap are these producers!?

crap my typing/spelling was done with as much care and editing as this show!

Here's what I love about you guys. HONESTY!!! You give it the shows (and to us readers) straight!

Thanks for the post.
xoxoxo

I'm going to go out on a limb here, and suggest that Anne is probably a fairly normal human being, and this persona that someone has asked her to put on is doing her a HUGE diservice.

And if there IS a 2nd season (yeah, I know), Anne needs to slap whomever it was upside the head and insist that she be allowed to act and dress like herself.

And I agree, they seriously need to overhaul the tasks.

BTW, on Tyra's shows, the bitch is typically eliminated @ final 3. That's either Kate or Megan...I'd include Dayshun in the equation, but he smells too much like the next one out.

It wouldve been a little more interesting if we could actually see her in the outfits.

any tv show or movie produced by Tyra Banks is a joke and has no credibility. you guys have finally caught on to that, good job. oh, and if you hated this episode, you'll hate the next one too. it's a huge joke. quit now while you're at it.

For those of us who missed the last episode (may have been a blessing, actually), it's now finally posted on the CW site.

I had to stop watching this show. My intelligence can't be insulted to this degree. Same reason I quit watching ANTM.

"There is a place for credible reality television and CW isn't it. That place is called Bravo."

The Real Housewives Trilogy:
Bravo's gift to the twenty-first century.

Since your brains are numb from the novcaine that is "Stylista" go ahead and turn the channel and take in an episode of "Blush: The Search for the Next Great Make-up Artist" on Lifetime. ;)
http://www.mylifetime.com/on-tv/shows/blush/cast

The show is nuts. They have to show the outfits on models or at *least* mannaquins. How is Ann and more importantly - the viewers at home - supposed to just look at these outfits in a paper bag?!
This show is 95% smackfest, 5% fashion. This show cannot even pretend to be in the same genre as Project Runway.

"Megan, meanwhile, is savoring every delicious moment of Ashlie's crackup while sipping on the blood of unbaptized babies."

Absolutely delicious!!

I think the whole point of the "Anne's going to literally take the outfit off the street" challenge is to freeze the contestants' asses off. While they're waiting for Anne to deliberate which one she's gonna get, you can clearly see Ashlie shivering.

What a dumb exercise.

Seriously, dressing your boss? Get a grip, TyTy.

Megan ROCKS!!!!!

I can't believe Elle would want to promote themselves like this. This definitly does NOT make me want to go out there and buy an Elle magazine. In fact, it kind of makes me want to pointedly tell everyone else not to buy it because the people that work for it give us this every week.

I watched one episode and gave up, by the way. I can't take that sort of mindlessness, I get it enough every day at college.

This episode was my first and, while I didn't hate it, I won't be upset if I don't catch it again.

I enjoy the show because it IS low brow entertainment. I see it as comedy or parody rather than an insight into the fashion industry.

These 12 year olds all take themselves very seriously, when they're just very immature. I guess it's just easy to laugh at them.

"...sipping the blood of unbaptized babies" has, HAS, to be one of your most unforgettable lines. Woo boy! You two have an incredible gift of stringing words together. The confines of websites just aren't enough for you; the world needs some TLo to be a happier place!

I tried to get into this show. I really did. But the screechiness and the drama and the elimination of the only halfway-decent human beings has just made it unpleasant.

I know I can't taste the food on Top Chef, but I'm switching over. Fight the good fight, boys.

Maybe that's the real reason Nina left, because she didn't want to be involoved with this crap.

If anyone should count their blessings, its Nina.

Can any of these kids write? Edit? Fact check? Work on a deadline? Poor Ann Slowly. She tries her hardest to put her time as a frumpy Journalism Master's degree from Northwestern behind her.

"There is a place for credible reality television and CW isn't it. That place is called Bravo."





'Credible reality television'?? Isn't that an oxymoron (like 'jumbo shrimp' and 'Fox news')??

--GothamTomato

TLo, I hope CW is giving you some serious kickbacks, because I think right now people are only watching this hideous show because you're blogging it.

at least, that's the only reason I'M watching it.

As someone who is in high school...these people are embarassingly childish.

Like, really?

Whenever she made that comment about running the bulls, DH and I looked at each other and burst into laughter.

"sipping the blood of unbaptized babies"
CLASSIC!!!!

"Megan, meanwhile, is savoring every delicious moment of Ashlie's crackup while sipping on the blood of unbaptized babies."

roflmao

you bitches rule, seriously.

I love all the self-important people who are 'too good' to watch this show but still come here to read and bitch about it. Um, ok.

The challenge was dumb, but I'm guessing they did not put the outfits on Anne or mannequins because of size issues. Or just to be stupid.

Boobs wore something besides an early '90's black spandex Melrose Place dress. I am surprised and elated.

I am sick of Dyshaun. He is stupid, has fucked up editorially every episode, and did not know what pin-tucking was either. If he doesn't anything abour journalism OR fashion, why is he on the show? Oh right, he's a bitch. 'Nuff said.

Having those partially opened bags for her to just peek into was weird! You couldn't see much of anything. Fashion is about the details, darling. I don't know why I am even complaining. A waste of my time but I still watch the show! At least I can read your blog to be entertained...

OK...I TRIED to watch this "locomotive disaster". Notice I didn't use the "TW" moniker??
No can do, have to drop it like a hot potato, just like I did ANTM after the first three or so cycles.
Blech.

Ok, so I've been out of pocket for more than a week because I was away on a cruise. Good to know I didn't miss much. The stupidity of this show amazes me. And yet I will watch on Wednesday, won't I? I'm definitely not right in the head.

TLo!

You forgot to mention that Anne said my outfit worked from top to bottom and even though the one time Kate styles something right, you can't see the bottoms (sorry boys) well I'm tellin ya they worked ;)


BTW Lindsay those H&M "light colored acid washed"- high waisted jeans with the purple wide belt were not trailer park. If you would like to classify one of the springs most prominent Los Angeles trends as awful, talk to Lilo not me.

While I can enjoy you review, I can't stand to actually watch this show. It's top chef for me, at least I can look at what Padma is wearing.

BTW - I am not renewing my subscription to Elle

This is off-topic, but I'm surprised you boys don't like Top Chef. It's great, and unlike a lot of other reality shows, it seems to get better and more credible each season. I have to say that it seems to get more credible than PR, even. The contestants are talented and the challenges are interesting. It's true that you can't taste the food, but you can't wear the outfits on PR, either.

Stylista Kate-

I thought your whole mantra was that you don't follow trends, you're a leo, blah, blah, blah- so explain the jeans that don't look good on you and are not fall/winter appropriate? I guess you shot this show going into the spring, but still, I thought you were a firm believer of ignoring the trends that don't work on specific individuals and it was obviously still so effing cold where you were (as you were all shivering your buns off during that street scene)...I'm a leo too, btw, and I work very well in groups and can command attention and lead without causing everyone else to hate me.

I hate LiLo's style, so I don't dress myself in it!

One more thing- buying your jeans at H&M is trailer park.

Stylista Kate! I have a question for you! My hair is about as long as yours, and although it is naturally pretty straight, it has a little curl when I don't mess with it. I love to curl it, and I use hot rollers, but I always find that the curls are too tight, and If I brush them a little, the curl falls out too much. I want the long, loose curls you've got going! Is that possible without a naturally curly head of hair??? I don't think there is anything as pretty as long loose curls, and I feel like I've tried everything! Any advice?

This show is ass. Why do you watch it?

Yes of course it's possible! I actually did Danielle's curls whenever she wanted them and they always stayed. Her hair is naturally pretty straight. I'm not sure about your hair but the more course it is the better. So I'll give you a rundown try it out, if it doesn't work we can go in and edit. Our hair actually looked better than what you see but after 15 hour days it looses its fluff.

First) After you wash your hair either let it air dry or if you blow dry don't actually brush out the tangles first. Brush your hair out after it's about half dry. Then shake it like crazy with your fingers teasing it as much as possible.The point of this is really to separate all the hairs. I highly recommend Britney and Victorias Secret boxers while teasing.

2) Use Conair Rollers that have been heating for at least 20 minutes.You can buy them at any drugstore. Only connair though!

3) Put the rollers: in always roll the hair from the ends to the root but not inwards (counter clockwork)

4) The reason your curls are too tight is because you leave the curlers in too long. I take mine out after about 6 minutes then I jump up and down.

5) DO NOT APPLY HAIRSPRAY OR ANY OTHER PRODUCT (all that stuff is a hoax meant to weigh your hair down and cause it misery)

6) DO Not brush out the curls or else you will look like you came straight from Mrs. Truvy's Hairdo Class

7) If all else fails chop off your hair and claim you love high fashion ;)

Comedy gold!

as soon as anne said "i could run the bulls in these shoes," i thought to myself "OOOH, GIRL, the PRGayBoys will have something to say about THAT." glad you didn't disappoint!

THANK YOU STYLISTA KATE!!! I will try your strategy tonight (I have a date!) and report back! I was doing practically non of the things you said- so no wonder it wasn't working! One more question- how much hair per roller? I have A TON of hair!! Thank you so much!

Why are you still watching this show? It's not even fun bad, it's just stupid. If it goes in to a second season, I am blaming you.

OMG I LOVE DATES!If you are going on a date past 9 you will miss Stylista. This is not an episode to miss. ;) Just kidding. HAVE FUN!! Just as much hair as you want per roller. However much you put on thats how the cul will go. Do LC size chunks, like inch lon. Grab it with your thumb and index.

Thank you stylista Kate! It came out perfectly!!! And while my date may go a little past 9...I'll definitely tivo stylista!!!

Hey, Guys, Kate's adorable. Here she is giving Hopeless Hair step by step hair instructions. What a sweetie. Of course, my hair is also unmanagble.

Sytlista Kate, I was confused about step #3. I'm rolling from ends to root but am I rolling under, toward the back, or up? Also, are you using the large size rollers? Thanks

I'm writing and eating cookies in my apartment right now and it's really cold. BRRRRR.

These are the kind I use
http://www.conair-store.com/product_detail.asp?T1=CON+CHV26IVR&HDR=HAIR

Honestly though you can get them at Wal-mart or some store like that for half the price.

You roll the hair in the direction you want it to go. So if you want it to curl kinda back (which I think is more natural looking) then you take the hair put the curler on top of it then roll upward toward the head. Does that make sense?

Thanks Kate. That does make sense. I'm sorry you're cold. I'm in California and wearing having unseasonable warm weather. It was 78 yesterday. BTW - I wanted to comment on Step #10. I really don't recommend it. Ask me how I know? :) That's how I found out I have curly hair (who knew?) What a nightmare - 1" hair sticking up in all directions all over my head. It's a lot longer now but I still need 6" inches more to hold all the (stupid, not helpful) curl down.

Thanks Kate. That does make sense. I'm sorry you're cold. I'm in California and wearing having unseasonable warm weather. It was 78 yesterday. BTW - I wanted to comment on Step #10. I really don't recommend it. Ask me how I know? :) That's how I found out I have curly hair (who knew?) What a nightmare - 1" hair sticking up in all directions all over my head. It's a lot longer now but I still need 6" inches more to hold all the (stupid, not helpful) curl down.